Rude doctor

Anything to do with the NHS or Private Healthcare.

Moderators: perseus, *Lisa*, FluppyPuffy

Rude doctor

Postby audreyh » Sun Apr 12, 2015 4:03 pm

I went to my doctor last year and asked to be referred to a dietician as I can't eat a lot of food for various reasons. I have gained a lot of weight and having never been over weight other than after pregnancies I struggle with this.

Anyway my doctor said to me , (female doctor) look we are both women over 40 and are educated and I'm sorry to say but it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that eating pies and crap food doesn't help our weight issues ... Now go home and plan a healthy diet no pies cakes crisps sweets or that and plenty of fruit and veg ..

Raging was an understatement when I left GP.
audreyh
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 25
Joined: Wed Apr 08, 2015 5:11 pm

Re: Rude doctor

Postby MPSGuy » Sun Apr 12, 2015 5:33 pm

Well with all respect her advise seems quite accurate. What do you expect the dietitian to do that you can't figure out yourself?
MPSGuy
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 80
Joined: Fri Jun 28, 2013 2:25 pm

Re: Rude doctor

Postby FluppyPuffy » Sun Apr 12, 2015 7:52 pm

A dietitian can, advise and help with devising suitable meals and menus, suggest alternatives to what can't be eaten MPSGuy. Finding what is right for each of us, whilst it is easy for some, others find it quite confusing so having someone help guide them thru the initial stages and get into it can make a big difference to them succeeding in making the changes.

Every once in a while, a dog enters your life and changes everything xx
As a Public Moderator of this forum my opinions/views expressed are personal and are no more valid than those of other members and not necessarily those of UKFibromyalgia.

If your dog doesn't like someone, then you probably shouldn't either
User avatar
FluppyPuffy
SITE ADMIN
 
Posts: 12719
Joined: Mon Jun 08, 2009 11:25 am
Location: Living Life On The Edge.......Of The Norty Step!!!

Re: Rude doctor

Postby Queenie_70 » Sun Apr 12, 2015 9:37 pm

Fluppy,

Oh dear!!! A doctor who should be listening to you, but shoots you down is no good to anyone. I would let your GP know, (the one that referred you), and a formal complaint can be made if you feel the need, but the bigger question is, where do you turn to now???

I am thinking that I have developed an intolerance to lactose. Not a major problem as I know what to avoid, but it does mean no more homemade cream and cheese sauces. No more meals with any hidden dairy...it makes life complicated and that is just one allergy.

I don't know if there is another dietitian that you might be able to be sent to instead? Hopefully, they may be more constructive with their advise :fingerscrossed:

If you are cooking for your family, but then have to make a totally separate meal for yourself because of the allergies, I can only sympathies with you.

We all know the basics of what we should and shouldn't be eating, but help, real help and recipes that work for your situation would have been more professional. Not a bl**dy lecture, and here's the door :!:

xxx
"Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."
User avatar
Queenie_70
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 363
Joined: Sat Apr 19, 2014 10:23 pm
Location: Consett, Co. Durham

Re: Rude doctor

Postby audreyh » Sun Apr 12, 2015 11:40 pm

Mpsguy .. I think you have jumped in to judge me too quickly . I suffer from Sjögren's syndrome, IBS, also have under active thyroid and most fruit gives me a very sore tummy. I have also put on loads of weight and it only since I have become un well. Plus my exercise is limited due to my health . So I would have liked to have had advice on what's right for me and what's wrong . I also don't like a lot things so I needed a hint at what to eat and portion size and how often etc ...

Well I stick to the original point I was trying to make that is I think the doctor should have been more understanding and tried to help me

Ps queenie_70 I am not good with bread, some fruits , dis like some veg, and yes it is a nightmare as I have a family to cook for too so I can't be doing with different meals .
audreyh
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 25
Joined: Wed Apr 08, 2015 5:11 pm

Re: Rude doctor

Postby Queenie_70 » Mon Apr 13, 2015 10:57 am

Audreyh,

I am so sorry, in my haste to respond I saw Fluppy's name and addressed my post to her not you :facepalm:

My post still stands, in that the doctor should have been more understanding and helpful, not judgmental and rude....that is not what they are trained for, though bedside manner seems to have gone out of the window :!:

Plus, making two meals for a family, would be a nightmare, I totally agree.....you need to find someone who can help you determine what will work for all of you. It is tough enough trying to be healthy for your family without this on top.

(((Gentle Hugs)))

xxxx
"Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."
User avatar
Queenie_70
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 363
Joined: Sat Apr 19, 2014 10:23 pm
Location: Consett, Co. Durham

Re: Rude doctor

Postby bandj » Mon Apr 13, 2015 12:42 pm

Hi, I am lactose and wheat intolerant. I use lactofree milk, cream, cheese and yoghurts. Alpro do a nice soya yoghurt too. Have you looked in the supermarket free from range. There is much more available now. Maybe you would be able to find something there? I do understand how tricky it can be as hubby is diabetic and lactose intolerant.

As re the doctor, her manner wasn't very helpful. But doctors are unfortunately human too and aren't infallible. I went to the doctor with chest pains that felt like indigestion. She had a right go at me for wasting her time instead of dialling 999! I hadn't wanted to waste ambulance and hospital time for indigestion. Turned out to be angina but I didn't know that until id hadva barrage of tests. Thankfully shes left the practice now.
There are these three things that remain: faith, hope and love. And the greatest of these is LOVE.
1 Corinthians 13:13
bandj
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 214
Joined: Thu Jan 09, 2014 7:56 pm

Re: Rude doctor

Postby audreyh » Mon Apr 13, 2015 2:18 pm

I just felt that because of my easy confusion and lack of memory and my diet that I have used for years an that breads an dairy bother me, I just needed help as my kids would know what to cook me that they liked too .. I don't do a lo of cooking now due to health reasons ... But oh well .. Maybe I'm just as previously stated a grown woman who should know better
audreyh
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 25
Joined: Wed Apr 08, 2015 5:11 pm

Re: Rude doctor

Postby Zia2014 » Mon Apr 13, 2015 2:21 pm

How charming! I have IBS too and can't eat fruit either.I was gutted as I love it. I saw a dietitian when I was diagnosed because the GP's advice was awful!

MPSGuy - there are a lot of medical conditions where a dietitian can be invaluable, suggesting other ways to get vitamins etc from food when you can't eat certain things. There are also ways and means of saying it that are far more tactful than how that GP put it. As Audrey clearly said she didn't used to have a problem with weight and now has various issues, your reply strikes me as a bit curt.
Zia2014
UKFM Regular
 
Posts: 1033
Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 2:55 pm

Re: Rude doctor

Postby Zia2014 » Mon Apr 13, 2015 2:23 pm

audreyh wrote: But oh well .. Maybe I'm just as previously stated a grown woman who should know better


Don't be daft! The comment from the GP and MPSGuy were out of order, you know what your issues are and tried to do something about it, what could be more 'grown up' than that?!
Zia2014
UKFM Regular
 
Posts: 1033
Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 2:55 pm

Re: Rude doctor

Postby TNK* » Mon Apr 13, 2015 2:50 pm

Whether or not the GP advice was good or not, it is the manner in which is delivered that is the issue here!

Rude rude rude rude, i would be making a complaint
A Dream Is A Wish Your Heart Makes When You're Fast Asleep ºOº


Jo xx
User avatar
TNK*
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 319
Joined: Wed May 07, 2014 4:14 pm

Re: Rude doctor

Postby ixel-chick » Mon Apr 13, 2015 4:26 pm

:lol: I find the doc, and MPSguy to be rude and funny. :lol:


However, your doc should have known better, and she would have heard about it "Fruit? Really - have you even bothered to glance at my notes?" (however, this would have been said with quite a few swearwords mixed into it). Unless of course you've never told the doc about your IBS.


Have you thought of doing one of those "food intolerance tests"? Or does a dietician do that (I got no idea what they do! Tell people what to eat? Then surely MPSguy hit the nail on the head. :-) Or maybe they actually try to find out what you can eat and not by science)?

My aunt once had one of those taken, and she stopped eating the foods the test showed her as intolerant too, and the weight just dropped off her!


I am now finally able to eat things like fruit again (and drink fruit juices), after having had to stay away from most of them (apart from bananas, never had a problem with them) for a decade due to IBS. A very unexpected side-effect to the tabs I'm on, but a very welcome one. :-D
☐ Fibro Mode / ☑ Normal Mode
User avatar
ixel-chick
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 175
Joined: Mon Jan 26, 2015 10:35 am

Re: Rude doctor

Postby MPSGuy » Mon Apr 13, 2015 9:27 pm

Well I'm sorry if my post appeared rude but I still stand by it.

I don't see what your doctor has said that is rude. She is saying you are an intelligent individual and would do just as well researching and planning your own diet as speaking to a dietitian.

The thing she said about cakes/pies/crisps/junk food is true. I've been extremely obese in the past and lost weight with healthy diet, so I can speak from personal experience: people don't get fat by eating fruit, lettuce and celery! IBS will be made worse by eating lots of greasy, refined and processed foods, plus those foods are usually very calorific. It really is that simple.

On a general point: when it comes to weight and diet everybody wants to be special these days. Everybody is 'intolerant' to X or Y food or has some reason or other they can't eat A, B or C healthy foods. There is always a reason why the individual can't take responsibility for what goes in their mouth.

Why not get the GP to check your thyroid replacement is optimal? Use a free online meal planner or recipe book and start exercising a little more. There are many BMR calculators out there that will give you a rough idea of how many calories you should be eating each day and what amount of carbs/fat/protein to aim for.

Don't get me wrong, I am not saying it is easy to lose weight and change diets. It really is anything but easy.
I just think it seems a bit unfair to criticizing the GP so harshly for what is quite decent advice?
MPSGuy
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 80
Joined: Fri Jun 28, 2013 2:25 pm

Re: Rude doctor

Postby carolad » Mon Apr 13, 2015 11:31 pm

I wonder if the GP just misunderstood you - it sounds like she thought you wanted a referral to a Dietician just for weight loss. But from what you've said, it is more because you have food intolerances and don't know how to get the right nutrition...I think! So that might account for her dismissal of your request - I don't think a GP would refer to a Dietician just for weight loss, since there is lots of information out there to guide people in the right direction. Not being able to get the nutrition you need from a restricted diet is a different issue entirely and I would have thought it was a good enough reason to see a Dietician.

There is lots of information out there on losing weight though and MPS Guy is right about finding out how many calories you should have a day, and roughly what percentage should be protein/fats/carbs etc. There are useful portion guides too - a 'portion' is much smaller than people think! Did you know,for example, that the correct portion size of pasta is only a fistful? Definitely worth making yourself aware of things like that.

Good luck with it :-)
carolad
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 415
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2014 12:04 am

Re: Rude doctor

Postby Zia2014 » Tue Apr 14, 2015 2:06 pm

MPSGuy wrote:I just think it seems a bit unfair to criticizing the GP so harshly for what is quite decent advice?


As TNK said, it is the method of delivery. Unless we live under rocks we are all fully aware that pies are bad and fruit is good. But there are far more tactful ways of saying it and it is quite clear from the OP that she has not struggled with her weight before, so it is not a lack of knowledge that is the problem, it is the medical issues that are impacting on her ability to eat healthily. I hope that makes it clearer.

A dietitian is brilliant with that and it is not a case of "eat that not this", they are specialists in different areas and mine was fantastic.

Having had problems with weight all my life, I can assure you that if a doctor spoke like that to me, a complaint would be winging it's way in! I don't see it as a doctors place to be 'funny' tbh, I can take a joke as well as anyone but IMHO that's not the place for it.

And this:

MPSGuy wrote:On a general point: when it comes to weight and diet everybody wants to be special these days. Everybody is 'intolerant' to X or Y food or has some reason or other they can't eat A, B or C healthy foods. There is always a reason why the individual can't take responsibility for what goes in their mouth.


You are wrong. I used to eat two apples a day, I loved them. I simply can't eat them anymore and was devastated about that. Yes some play on their issues but not all of us do, thanks.
Zia2014
UKFM Regular
 
Posts: 1033
Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 2:55 pm

Next

Return to Doctors & Health Services

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest