Concerned about my family

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Concerned about my family

Postby Whiplashsal » Wed Jul 25, 2012 6:34 pm

Hi all,

Diagnosed with Fibromyalgia last week after suffering for just 6 months. I am a fighter and have a good doctor to work with. Today i put in a claim for DLA as i have a LOT of trouble with basic things... like staying awake, and the pain in my hands and shouders, neck, knees and feet sorta preclude me from being able to muster the energy or enthusiasm to cook and clean etc.

My problem is with the DLA form. I have completed it honestly, i have pointed out that, as a single mum, I am helped a LOT by my kids, my eldest son who is 18 has to make the food as i can no longer do it (pretty much ever) and that they have to make sure i am up in the morning, and go to bed of a night (i am generally asleep on the couch). I am concerned that the DLA people will say i am unfit to look after my children (my youngest is just 6) and take them off me. Considering theis is extremely debilitating, i am very concerned that they will do it.

Has anyone had any similar experiences? I would be completely lost without my kids!!
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Re: Concerned about my family

Postby masonsbarms » Wed Jul 25, 2012 6:44 pm

hi, i havnt had any experience personaly, but there are a lot of young carers out there,

your eldest are doing a great job and your youngest is not comeing to any harm or neglect.

people have cares come in to help them care for there children.

i dont think you need to worry as they dont like breaking up familys only as a last resort or in cases where the child will be harmd or neglected.

social workers work with familys if asked to make sure you are getting all the help you need to care for your family.

use your time and any energy yoy have in learning as much as you can about fm and working out what helps and what makes things worse.

hope you are successful with your claim and things get better soon,

take care xx
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Re: Concerned about my family

Postby denys » Wed Jul 25, 2012 6:47 pm

Hi wls I was considering moving your post into the 'hello' bit as its your first but I think its best suited here so have left it. Firstly, I think social services are more concerned with keeping families together and would work with you and the children to find the best possible solution for you. There is help out there, have you no other close family members who could help you???? Did you get help filling in your forms????

CAB/DIAL or even social services offer help with forms to try to get the best results first time so :fingerscrossed: you get the help you all need :-D :-D

As a Public Moderator of this forum my opinions/views expressed are personal and are no more valid than those of other members and not necessarily those of UKFibromyalgia.
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Re: Concerned about my family

Postby Sazzle » Wed Jul 25, 2012 9:51 pm

Denys is correct. Social services can actually help you. There is support for young carers available. They can even organise respite for them and get someone in to help you whilst they are away. Kids being taken away is always the very very very last resort. I work in mental health and we deal with the children and families teams a lot. We have to alert them in certain situations but the primary aim is to keep the family together and provide support to make sure this happens.
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Re: Concerned about my family

Postby darkcyde » Wed Jul 25, 2012 9:56 pm

Hi....we currently have Child Services involved after i tried to commit suicide, and to be honest.....they are great! yes, they want to do everything possible to keep families together, and from what you say your whole family is pulling together to help eachother so personally i think you'll be fine! good luck!
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Re: Concerned about my family

Postby Whiplashsal » Thu Jul 26, 2012 12:43 am

Thankyou for your words of wisdom! I can relax now! My friend helped me complete my form and she used to work for DLA years ago! Am sure it's all changed now though!!! I am expecting to be turned down as so many others have :-(

I do have family who 'can' help, my dad and sister for eg however they are too busy with their own busy lives! My mum has been great but she is proper poorly too so can't do much! By default, my big lad helps me and my little un is there to give me cuddles and make me smile x

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