Don't know where to turn HELP

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Re: Don't know where to turn HELP

Postby FluppyPuffy » Sat Jun 01, 2013 2:14 pm

Sorry to hear what has happened lulu :blowkiss: :grouphug: :hugs: I wish I had a magic wand to make things better for you :( :(

I've only had a quick look at your linky as my head has started :hit1: :hit1: :hit1: :hit1: :hit1: :hit1: :hit1: and it looks as if they could help with at least some of what you need to do. To definitely find out tho, I think you'd need to contact them, explain what has happened and see what they have to say. They have an email "Contact Us" form as well as a phone number with their opening hours.

Alternatively, you could try your local council. They usually have details of organisations in your area who may be able to help and advise you, and quite often they also have their own info/advice points as well.

There is help out there that can you get thru this situation you've unfortunately found yourself having to deal with, and with you saying it's already having an effect on your symptoms and condition, you might also want to consider seeing your GP for some additional help thru things flaring up.
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Re: Don't know where to turn HELP

Postby fibro-lu » Sat Jun 01, 2013 2:21 pm

Hi Lulu,
shocking to hear and welcome back,

just reading what I wrote and it is mostly questions and it might seam a bit much :crazy: and worrying but I don't mean to worry :yikes: you
it is just to get a bigger picture and to be able to include or exclude stuff and to be able to set priorities

I am happy to be pmed, I am not an expert but happy to share my 2 pence worth of brain

it is not in a neatly done essay, sorry, but like to get it to you asap in order to give you something to work on and to know that you are noticed
sure others have done this already
anyway
not to confuse you more I will send this now
and will get in touch soon


am I right you are not working and you have no kids together and he left your shared home (you asking JSA and he's no contactable)

there are sure other people here who have more info for you but I will ive a bit of a brain storm

monday morning:
- try to relax and breath slowly, you have a few errands to run today
- go to you GP to get a sicknote/not fit for work note
- go to Job Centre to register for ESA and JSA (to cover you for both eventuallities, whichever benefit you apply will start from the day you register, or whatever it is called))
- whilst at Job Centre get a ESA form and a JSA form (can't remember rightly but think you get them there)
- go to Housing Benefit Centre get form for Housing benefit (and Council Tax and Tax Credits?) think you can register there too or it might be done "automatically" with and by the Job Centre Poeple, others here might have a better idea
-

have you joint or seperate bank accounts?
have you claimed any benefits in a joint claim?
from which bank accounts does the bill come out?
who is named on the bills?
who is named on the rent argeement?
all the best :cow-wave: Lu
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Re: Don't know where to turn HELP

Postby Hellyn » Sat Jun 01, 2013 2:27 pm

Hello Lulu, You want advice here you go.
1.contact your gp for support and help with health issues. Ask for practical support or a referral to a support team.
2.contact Jobcentre plus and apply for your benefits and see the disabled benefits advisor if you can.
3.contact your local council..I assume this would be Bexley about housing benefit, council tax etc..
4.OR...http://www.bexley.gov.uk/index.aspx?articleid=4076 :-D
which has a plethora of support to offer and I think this would be your best bet.

I hope this helps. I know it can be difficult enough to be abandoned but to have no support structure in place is a cruel thing to do to anyone in your position. I do not know you or him, but I imagine he just reached a point of stress and dealt with it as self preservation and not meant to be mean.

You just concentrate on sorting you out and gain some independence with support and enjoy life.

Many many blessing LuLu.
I speak from experience.
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Re: Don't know where to turn HELP

Postby Kyomii » Sat Jun 01, 2013 2:33 pm

Hello, I am sorry to hear what happened :(
First of all, "register as disabled" isn't what it used to mean. If you are blind/deaf, you can register as blind/deaf - apart from that, there is no "register". http://www.nhs.uk/chq/pages/2571.aspx?c ... goryid=155

Jobseekers allowance is not the right benefit for you if you are too ill to work, so no need to apply for it.

What you need to apply for is ESA (Employment and Support Allowance.) https://www.gov.uk/employment-support-a ... e/overview

You can also try and apply for DLA (Disability Living Allowance) but now it has changed it's name to PIP (Personal Independance Payment) https://www.gov.uk/pip

If you are renting your home, you can also apply for Housing Benefit https://www.gov.uk/housing-benefit and you can apply for Council Tax Reduction https://www.gov.uk/council-tax-reduction

You do NOT need to be "registered disabled" to claim any disability benefits. I would advise making an appointment with your local citizens advice bureau and they will help you fill in any claim forms and assist with what you need. Do not try to fill the gorms in yourself, they can be very overwhelming.

If you have any children, you need to apply IMMEDIATELY for child tax credits. https://www.gov.uk/child-tax-credit/overview

I hope this helps.
Last edited by Kyomii on Sat Jun 01, 2013 2:43 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: Don't know where to turn HELP

Postby fibro-lu » Sat Jun 01, 2013 2:36 pm

good ole flupp :chicken: :chicken:
compared with me :chicken-dance: :chicken-dance:

here are 3 official sites to check out (sorry for cross posting)

https://www.gov.uk/jobseekers-allowance

http://www.dwp.gov.uk/employment-and-support/

http://www.dwp.gov.uk/local-authority-s ... g-benefit/

calm now and will behave,
:blowkiss: :blowkiss: :blowkiss:
all the best :cow-wave: Lu
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Re: Don't know where to turn HELP

Postby fibro-lu » Sat Jun 01, 2013 2:41 pm

I have to say wow what a welcome Lulu

and I think that is just the beginning

of a brilliant support net for you in this troubesome time

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:
all the best :cow-wave: Lu
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Re: Don't know where to turn HELP

Postby fibro-lu » Mon Jun 03, 2013 7:59 pm

Hi Lulu, :-D

just a quick check up and much more organized, I hope

glad you could sort out the JSA, everything seems to be online these days, I wonder what 75 years old do? Asuming they don't use them??
but I need to stay focused

hope all goes well with your GP, what might help is, if you have time today, write down what it is you want to get out of this appointment

good news from the landlord, he obviously knows your situation, doesn't want to go through the hassle to find new tenants and hopefully he is willing to wait until Housing benefit is paying some money to you, sometimes it goes quick within 4 weeks but could take 6 weeks, sometimes 8, they will back pay; for your landlord it is still better to wait than have the place empty for a forthnight and having to redecorate etc
hope he didn't increase the rent
if there is a delay in any stuff you can still get the Housing benefit started, just hand in missing documents later, it all counts from the date you actually contact them the first time (don't know if that again counts if that happens online)

what do you mean by "getting registerated"? do you mean disabled?

it was me asking about the bank accounts and children, just to make you aware that if you had joint accounts to make sure you too had access and with the kids I was just wondering if they were "his" and he would let them down ..... but it is not, well at least not kids under 10

with the bills, not sure if all you have to do is calling the suppliers and give them your( lets say) meter number and address and tell them that there is a change of name and bank details
don't believe that this is how it is done, because then anybody could fish somebodies details out of the letter box and play mayhog with your stuff, but then I seam to remember when I last moved, all I did was telling my suppliers that I move from here to there

I hope this was of help
all the best :cow-wave: Lu
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Re: Don't know where to turn HELP

Postby Iceskatemum » Mon Jun 03, 2013 11:25 pm

So sorry to hear you predicament , at least you have your boys to help you through all of this , which is small consolation for the turmoil you must be going through

As others have said please go see the disability advisor in the social security office and when you see your GP get a fit for work note (old sick line ), see if GP will give you say 8-12 weeks as unfit for work makes things a bit easier when sending not fit for work notes through to benefits people.

Once you have your sick note then ring the benefits folk and tell them you now need to apply for ESA, as JSA no longer applicable as your doctor has found you unfit for work . Your claim should then be from the date of your phone call , make the call when you have a bit of time as the benefits folk sometimes fill it all out over the phone & then send you the completed form to review. Look carefully when they do send the form as they sometimes seem to put in a deliberate mistake just to make sure that you check it. then sign the form and send back to benefits office.

You may also be eligible to DLA /PIP ( seems to depend where you are in the country as to which is applicable . PIP is being rolled out at different stages. Again ring the DLA office and ask for a claim form (claim then logged as from that date) it is a complex form so you may need help in filling it in (CAB MAy be able to help ) , just make sure you get it back by the date requested by the benefits people. Something to keep in mind, if you need help with personal care , you son can claim Carers allowance provided he looks after you for more than 35hrs a week and earns less than a specified sum of money in his P/T job.

Good luck with all of this , just take your time and work through all the forms .

I would put up a big list of what you have to do somewhere you can see it and as you finish a task tick it off that way you can keep on top of what needs done with out getting confused or miss a deadline .Just brain storm and put everything into a bit list then perhaps write it all down again in order of priority so you know what you need to do every day.

Good luck and you know where we are if you need anything , there is always someone who can help .
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Re: Don't know where to turn HELP

Postby whoami » Tue Jun 04, 2013 1:07 am

LuLu. I am sorry this is happening to you. I am also sorry I can't help you with what to do....I live in Canada

I can be here to listen when you need to be heard, hold your hand when you need one for support and give you love and encouragement in your journey ahead.

I have one question....since he supported you does he have any legal obligation to do so still? Countries do have different laws.

Take care and look after yourself before anything else, x
[i][b]

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Re: Don't know where to turn HELP

Postby fibro-lu » Fri Jun 07, 2013 9:22 pm

hi Lulu,

just wondering how things are

:flowers: :flowers:
all the best :cow-wave: Lu
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