Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

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Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

Postby Grannypants » Mon Aug 05, 2013 2:53 pm

Hi, after waiting for 16 long months my tribunal is all set for this Thursday August 8th at 10am. My partner is driving me there but he suffers really badly with IBS so he won't be able to come in with me as he needs to be near a toilet. I'm concerned because I don't go anywhere on my own due to suffering from anxiety, I stated this in my claim and the reply was that although I preferred to have someone with me I didn't need them. My partner is having time off work to take me, my son who usually goes everywhere with me is unable to go due to being ill himself. Now I'm worried that if I go in alone it will back up the DWP's claims that I don't need anyone with me when the truth is, I am petrified of going in alone but don't have a choice as there is nobody else I can take. I'm in such a state right now, I have known the date for a while but the past few days leading up to it I have become increasingly frightened and can't eat or sleep. I just want it to be over.
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Re: Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

Postby Iceskatemum » Mon Aug 05, 2013 3:06 pm

For your own sake you probably might be better to have someone with you, while I haven't experienced a tribunraI know even hospital appointments get me all flustered. Is there anyone else you can think off who might be able to come, a friend / neighbour or given your partner will be there anyway given they're driving could they come in with you on the understanding with the tribunal that they may have to excuse themselves at short notice due to thier own difficulties/illness.
Even just having them in the back ground might be just enough to give you the confidence you need at a time like this and it also shows that you are not alone.

What ever you decide , good luck
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Re: Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

Postby Grannypants » Mon Aug 05, 2013 3:25 pm

I don't have anyone else that can come with me unfortunately but yes that might be an option, I just didn't want to put him through it. He has worked for the same firm for 18 years but still spends an hour in and out of the toilet before he leaves for work so I can't imagine how he will be if he comes in with me. I spoke to welfare rights and they said sometimes having your partner go in with you isn't such a good idea as they might try to answer for you or get upset by the questions being asked or the manner in which they are asked and try to defend you. I really am in such a state.
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Re: Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

Postby clubsound4 » Mon Aug 05, 2013 4:31 pm

Hi , I recently attended my partners hearing and although I could of gone in with him I thought I might of put him off because to be honest he doesn't really understand the system and I am not allowed to speak for him the only people who can talk are cab or welfare rights,,at least your hearing is pretty early and they should hopefully tell you there and then,, very good luck, let us know :-D :-D :-D
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Re: Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

Postby denys » Mon Aug 05, 2013 5:19 pm

Good luck Grannypants, your husband could go in with you and ask to leave if he needs the loo I hope everything goes ok for you :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed:
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Re: Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

Postby mrslucy » Mon Aug 05, 2013 5:52 pm

Hi...you sound as if you really do need someone there to support you. Your partner is the ideal person to be with you. Can I suggest on the way on Thursday having some relaxing music on in the car...classical or meditation type, do deep breathing techniques as well, try using lavender oil on your pillow, just a little will do. I also swear by Bach's Rescue Remedy, use it the day before, just a couple of drops on your tongue (does not interfere with medication) every hour on Weds. and again on Thursday. If during the interview it all gets a bit much just ask for a short break which you are absolutely entitled to do. Has your partner tried drinking Aloe Vera juice (Holland & Barret) or online from Forever Living Products which is the best juice you can buy. I have IBS & regularly drink this juice with amazing effects! good Luck I am sure there will be lots of people rooting for you.
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Re: Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

Postby Grannypants » Mon Aug 05, 2013 6:04 pm

Thank you for your replies and good wishes. I think it's been going on for so long now that now it's finally here I'm totally overwhelmed. I will tell my partner about the suggestions, however he is very funny about using anything, strange I know but that's men for you, haha. I will let you know the outcome. Apparently 10am is a good time as it's the first of the day so no chance of any appointments before me overrunning and mine being cancelled. I keep trying to read through the forms again but it isn't going in, it was Dec 2011 when I originally filled them in and I can't remember what I wrote. Also I am concerned about the negative GP report that was submitted at that time as it says I didn't have any problems. I explained at the time that I had never had an opportunity to discuss what effect my illness had on me but they took no notice. I have fibro, RA, Cervical spondylosis, Ankylosing spondylitis and bursitis and that's all the GP told them. Oh well, only 3 more sleeps, if you can call them sleeps!
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Re: Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

Postby Cheltz » Tue Aug 06, 2013 7:28 am

I had my trunal last week and my partner came in with me. Although all the questions from the panel were directed at me, my partner was allowed to speak and add bits that I hadn't mentioned and was also able to back up what help I stated I needed from him on a daily basis. I firmly believe that without his back up I wouldn't have been as successful. In my opinion he definately needs to be with you.

I can only comment on my own experience and from reading others posts on here I appreciate that all experiences are different but I found the staff and tribunal panel at the Derby Tribunal centre to be very accommodating and extremely helpful with any worries I had.

A clerk came out to the waiting room before my hearing to explain what would happen. He included my partner in this discussion and if your tribunal should follow this format, this would be a great time to explain about the problems your OH has with his IBS and that he may need to be excused at some point during your hearing. Ask that he informs the panel about your OH and then when go in make sure that you also tell them yourself, this way you wont be left fretting that the clerk may have forgotten. This situation after all is a big part of the difficulties that you face on a daily basis and should be included in your submittions, by that I mean, I am sure that if you were fit and well you would not be fearfull about being left on your own whilst your partner has to attend to his own health problems. This is your time to explain face to face how your condition impacts on your life and I guess you have been waiting a long time for your tribunal, so grab this opportunity to tell them everything and don't be afraid to ask them to refraise a question if you don't understand fully what they are asking. Be honest but also hammer home your point, I found it easier to get my points across face to face rather than trying to explain on paper.

Good luck for Thursday. I hope all goes well. Now go and kick ass. Lol.

Cheltz. X
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Re: Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

Postby Grannypants » Tue Aug 06, 2013 10:29 am

Mine is at Derby too! I have been told it is a small place, like sitting in someone's living room. I will definitely speak with the clerk and explain the problems my partner has. He is happy to go in with me, it's me that is worried about him. I feel like such a burden on him and don't want to put him through it. On the one hand I will feel embarrassed if he is there as although he obviously knows the problems I have, it's another thing entirely me voicing them. In fact that is another worry I have, when I filled the forms out I wasn't entirely forthcoming with information and played down the difficulties I face as I was in denial at the time. I really wish now that I had, had some advice and help with filling them out but there didn't seem to be any help available. I live near Burton on trent and the Burton CAB aren't funded the way some others are so they couldn't help because of my partners income unless we paid, which we weren't in a position to do. Swadlincote CAB couldn't help because I live in Staffordshire. I contacted welfare rights who also couldn't help so I filled them in myself. I didn't go into detail about the difficulties I face and I think that will go against me at the hearing as anything I say that doesn't match up will make me look like a liar.
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Re: Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

Postby Cheltz » Tue Aug 06, 2013 11:14 am

Yeah I totally understand where you are coming from. I also filled in my own forms and tended to play down how badly my illnesses impacted on my life and what I could no longer do for myself. I find it difficult to come to terms with amount of help I now need and I hate having to ask for help. It's embarrassing to have to search for words that would at one time just rolled off my tongue, not to be able to express myself as I once did, to ask my Mum, Dad, partner, daughter to help me wash, shower and dress, cut my food up like a child etc etc. I feel guilty as hell seeing the impact my illness has on those close to me. My family are great, very supportive, but they can only be that way because after years of denial and in a way trying to protect them from worrying, I broke down and everything I had kept to myself came gushing out. On hind sight I wish I had told them sooner how bad I was actually feeling. So you having to go through things with your OH there could be a good thing.

Yes Derby Tribunal office is only small, a simple waiting room with a wipe board listing the running order for that day and who is on the panel, a security guards desk and two rooms leading of where the tribunals take place. The room where the case is held is small with a a table where the 3 panel members sit, you and your partner sit on the opposite side of the table. There's a desk where the clerk sits, he taps away at a computer a taking notes of what is said.

After my hearing I was asked to return to the waiting room, after about 10 mins I was told the decision and given a letter to confirm this and they send a copy of their decision to the DWP. My hearing was over a week ago and I still haven't heard from the DWP yet although I did phone them a couple of days after my hearing to confirm that they had received the tribunals decision. They certainly don't rush themselves.

By the way the nearest car park is at the bottom of Abbey Street, opposite the RSPCA, if you have a blue badge, parking is free.

Cheltz x
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Re: Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

Postby Grannypants » Tue Aug 06, 2013 12:53 pm

Thank you so much for the help Cheltz, I can't begin to tell you how much it means to me having advice from someone who has not only just been through it themselves, but also at the same venue. i don't have a blue badge but I am hoping to be dropped off at the door then my partner can go and park the car. I've got so many things going around my head at the moment and my stomach is constantly churning. On the plus side I have lost a few pounds, I may just market it...The Tribunal Diet! It has a certain ring to it don't you think? Seriously though, I will be so glad when it's over and I have the decision. I have fought so hard and for so long now, I'm trying to be optimistic but I am failing. I honestly don't expect them to overturn the decision but I will tell them everything and then at least I have tried. x
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Re: Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

Postby Grannypants » Thu Aug 08, 2013 1:09 pm

I just wanted to let everyone who was kind enough to offer me advice that my appeal was successful and I was awarded middle rate care. I am a little disappointed that I wasn't awarded any mobility despite my gp and other health professionals attesting that I cannot walk more than 30 metres but at least I had an opportunity to put my side across. The panel were wonderful and very friendly and although I was scared when I first went in, I soon felt quite relaxed and able to answer questions. x
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Re: Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

Postby evie15 » Thu Aug 08, 2013 2:19 pm

Just seen this. Sorry I didn't wish you luck.

Well done, good result and your fight is over too. :-D
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Re: Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

Postby Grannypants » Thu Aug 08, 2013 2:22 pm

I'm so glad it is, I don't think I could have fought much longer. I'd like to say to anyone who is doubting whether or not it was worth going to a tribunal, it really is. Voicing how you feel is so much easier than writing it down.
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Re: Tribunal this Thursday, need advice.

Postby Iceskatemum » Thu Aug 08, 2013 2:30 pm

Well done so glad it went well , now you can at least stop worry ing and get a bit of rest.
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