In a dilemma, don't know what to do, HELP!!!!

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In a dilemma, don't know what to do, HELP!!!!

Postby Johafa » Sat Oct 12, 2013 3:43 pm

Hi all,

I need you help/advice. I've been diagnosed with FM about 8 months ago but I have been off work for 1 year now. I also have chronic back pain related to a herniated disc. My thyroid gland stopped working altogether and I have a vitamin D deficiency. I am following everything my GP is telling me to do ... ie exercises (aqua running and I'm in a staying steady program), medication, etc. I am doing all that in the hope of being able to go back to work. I was told by the consultant that if I do all this, I would be able to go back to feeling somewhat normal within 2 to 3 years. Recently I've been having problems with my ears. They are constantly buzzing and they are itchy, also I keep getting ear infections after ear infections. A week ago, I had an appointment in ENT and was given an earing test. It turns out that I've lost 50% of my earing in my right ear and 25% in my left one. I'm told the buzzing will never go away. It's annoying and sends me into panic attacks along with other types of noises as I've discovered I have a noise intolerence due to FM. When the consultant asked me what I did for a living, I said I work in a call center, to this he replied, not anymore and smiled. He said he could fit me with an earing aid but that would accentuate some of the noises that sends me into panic attacks so he's referring me to some kind of therapy to learn to live with the buzzing and noises.

Last week, to top it all up, I received a letter from work offering me a settlement to terminate my employment with them. I am thinking of accepting this settlement but my husband is against the idea. He claims we will loose too much and maybe, just maybe, later on, they might find something to "cure" me and will be able to go back. I work for Sky and we get our TV package and other products for free. We also get rent and council tax benefits. If we accept the settlement, we will loose all of that. I'm still fighting to get PIP and I'm on ESA at the moment but will loose that if I settle. I have until Monday afternoon to think about it. I haven't been able to sleep or do anything since I received that letter. I feel like crap and I don't know what to do. I know I can't go back but what if (as my husband thinks).


Thanks for reading this long post, I appreciate it.

Me xx
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Re: In a dilemma, don't know what to do, HELP!!!!

Postby Garyl » Sat Oct 12, 2013 3:56 pm

Johafa As far as i am aware it is illegal to terminatye your employment if on the sick , you should not consider this action unless you know you will be better off.

Fibromyalgia is a terrible debilitating illness do not be pressured into taking the offer get it checked first by someone who knows the law.
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Re: In a dilemma, don't know what to do, HELP!!!!

Postby Smily » Sat Oct 12, 2013 5:32 pm

The panic attacks will cease once your thyroid gets under control with levothyroxine. It's one very nasty symptom from hypothyroidism, it nearly drove me nuts.

Regarding your husband he's going to need to get a grip with fibro and how affects your life and hability to work - if you are fit to work or not only you know at this stage.

Take care of yourself - Rule number one. :-)
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Re: In a dilemma, don't know what to do, HELP!!!!

Postby denys » Sat Oct 12, 2013 5:41 pm

Unfortunately it is not illegal to terminate your employment whilst on the sick, it is something the job centre asks employers to think twice about doing but they have the right if you have been on extended sick as you are not helping the business.

See what the offer is, would they continue to give you your packages for a specific time???? Do you have a pension with them which includes health benefits as then maybe you could go with retirement due to ill health :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: (this sometimes can be a very difficult thing to achieve :yikes: )

I was made redundant due to being off for over 6 months as they had shared my job amongst a number of other people, I had no option they wouldnt consider ill health retirement as I didnt have a diagnosis at that point and I too thought you couldnt be got rid of while on the sick but the job centre put me right :( :( :( :(

I thik you need to talk to either CAB/DIAL or the job centre as to what is the best route for you :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed:

As a Public Moderator of this forum my opinions/views expressed are personal and are no more valid than those of other members and not necessarily those of UKFibromyalgia.
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Re: In a dilemma, don't know what to do, HELP!!!!

Postby Johafa » Sat Oct 12, 2013 6:17 pm

Thank you all for your responses. They are very helpful.

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Re: In a dilemma, don't know what to do, HELP!!!!

Postby JYB » Sat Oct 12, 2013 7:20 pm

Hi, you are in a difficult situation. I was almost dismissed because of sickness, if I had gone off sick one more time then that would be it. It was very difficult going to work when in pain but I managed to keep my job. I work in the NHS and was advised by my union rep, but at the end of the day if I couldn't do my job then I would be dismissed, it's brutal. Do you belong to a union? If you do they can advise you. If not then speak to Citizens Advice but that will be difficult as you have to give work an answer so soon. You need to talk to someone who knows employment law, perhaps search on line in your area.
Just keep remembering that things never stay the same and somehow you will find a way through this. I hope things improve for you soon.
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Re: In a dilemma, don't know what to do, HELP!!!!

Postby fibro-lu » Sun Oct 13, 2013 9:13 am

maybe you could ask employer to give you more time to consider
this would give you time to get more information together and to ask around
all the best :cow-wave: Lu
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Re: In a dilemma, don't know what to do, HELP!!!!

Postby Bridgitte » Sun Oct 13, 2013 12:57 pm

It seems that so many of us with Fibromyalgia have an under-active thyroid, and I've also been diagnosed with another hormone problem, cortisonal to do with my adrenal gland and see the endocrologist next month.

The noise in your ears could be tinnitus, and can vary in different sounds and different levels, for me it can be a nightmare; can't hear anything else over it sometimes, can make me dizzy!! There is nothing that can be done for it, but my GP did suggest getting something with earphones to try and drown out the noise, I now have an iPod with various music, so when the tinnitus is a big problem, I can drown it with something heavy like metal!!

As for panic attacks, I still get them regardless on being on correct dose of levothyroxine, but as I also have a lung problem and was seen by a physiotherapist on two occasions to help with breathing exercises, and that they would help with panic/anxiety problems, and trying to block it from the mind; it does actually help, at least for me, might not for everyone though and I stopped taking Citalipram (my decision, already on so much medication!). Its worse when I'm out going somewhere and usually have to watch the ground and look up every so often, but gets easier for me the closer I get home. The therapist got me to breathe in through the nose slowly and as far as possible, hold and count to ten, then breathe out slowly through the nose, not the mouth, if possible.

It is difficult trying to get across to others how bad our illness actually are and can be as the phases vary, have you been given any information booklets on FM? Get your partner to read something like that, but chances are, people don't want to know anyway - unless it happens to them and then its a different matter completely!!

Stay strong, I know it can be difficult the majority of the time and have occasions when we can think what the hell, but we can't let FM have all it's own way :cry: :nono:
Last edited by FluppyPuffy on Sun Oct 13, 2013 2:46 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Made paragraphs clearer for easier reading.
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Re: In a dilemma, don't know what to do, HELP!!!!

Postby whoami » Sun Oct 13, 2013 4:20 pm

Johafa......your health is number one.

I can only say financially you will manage some how. It took 10 years to sort money out for me, my hubby lost his business but we got through it. much as it seems that money wise you need to work, your health does come first.

As far as work goes and offering a pkg. I would ask about you continuing to receive your benefits with them, your health benefits etc as well as all the free services you receive. I would suggest at least a years worth until things get sorted out financially for you. I have heard of some companies including such things in pkg's offered.

Think seriously about what is offered. If you can't go on a permenent sick benefit this might be a good offer. You never know, down the road if you don't accept, is there a possibility they could some how make you redundant for some other reason than illness (anything so they can get rid of you legally) ?

I can relate as my hubby is going through something similar. Try not to let this stress you out, take care!

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