working with FM

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working with FM

Postby paulf » Thu Nov 07, 2013 12:17 pm

start off with a simple plea HELP

i am at the end of my tether with this FM and the problems related to it

i am a 40 yr old man with a lovelly and supportive family who are my world

i was diagnosed this year but have suffered for some time now. i am trying to hold down a job that i hate with an employer that does everything in its power to make my life difficult. unfortunatly i feel trapped because of my illness my sick record from work is not good and i am in the throws of being let go from my employment. i manage a team of people who have caused me so much stress over the last three years that i am a shadow of myself i have made complaints to my managers and been told that i must shut up and put up.

not only do i feel increasingly ill with the FM but i have this none stop stress at work, i just feel stuck. i cant leave work we need the money, i struggle to cope in work but work makes me ill and brings on the FM more, what more can i do.

i am ashamed to admit that recently i have thought about what the benefit would be financialy to my family if i had a fatal accident in work. i know this sounds dramatic but i cant think of anything else and i have just about given up.

dont know why i am posting this but inside i am just asking for help
Last edited by FluppyPuffy on Thu Nov 07, 2013 3:37 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Split into paragraphs and twiddled with grammar for easier reading.
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Re: working with FM

Postby denys » Thu Nov 07, 2013 3:03 pm

Hi Paul, firsly I would go to the doc and explain how you are feeling it may be you need some extra help maybe tablet maybe one of the talking therapies or maybe both. You say your family are your life, well you are probably theirs too and so would be devastated if anything happened to you while you were in work.

Constantly going into a situation where you are so very unhappy will wear you down completely and if you dont do something to ease those feelings then you are in danger of having a breakdown. I hope you can get some help from your GP and your company see they are not helping you at all. Be kind to yourself :hugs:

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Re: working with FM

Postby scartlass » Thu Nov 07, 2013 6:50 pm

Hi Paul, sorry your having such a bad time, I would also advise to see your DR. have you spoken to the HR department at work? I would think your manager is breaking the law by not helping with your disability, I would try and get advice on this.

Please don't done anything to your self at work or other wise, your family would much rather have you than money, even tho I understand why it has crossed your mind, but it's not an option really, well at least not a good one, your family would be heartbroken.
let us know how you get on,

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Re: working with FM

Postby ru.campbell » Thu Nov 07, 2013 9:58 pm

Hi Paul. My FMS was also a product if work stress.

First piece of advice: if FMS is stopping you from working and you're off sick a great deal you need to apply to the local authority to register yourself as suffering a physical disability. With the raft of symptoms and medications we take with FMS that shouldn't be hard,but you need to be able to say you have trouble walking 50m most days--which is true of most mornings for me!

They will probably ask to check with your doctor--so let them. Once you have your registration of physical disability your are far more protected from dismissal under the Discrimination Act . This usually comes with the blue badge scheme if you're a driver. If your workplace has thoughts of getting rid, they have to do so by listing reasons THAT DO NOT relate to your disability unless they can prove that your illness means you just can't do the job anymore.

If not, they are on dodgy ground indeed.

Next: if your FMS is caused by stress at work consider getting a lawyer,and start gathering evidence that it was stress from mismanagement that caused your illness. If people can back up your claim that no-one helped you at work when you complained, so much the better. If you're in a union call them, too. Most unions will foot the lawyers bill for their members while your solicitor decides whether you have a winnable case.

Last: You are the victim here. If this is what bad management has done to you I hope you sue them back to the Stone Age.

Good luck


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