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The UKFibromyalgia Forums • View topic - Off work today, but feeling like a fraud!



Off work today, but feeling like a fraud!

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Off work today, but feeling like a fraud!

Postby keaedmondson » Wed Jan 07, 2015 8:07 am

So I've had two days back at work this term but for some reason this morning just feel like I can't go in. I haven't slept well last few nights so that probably has something to do with it. I feel dizzy and shaky.

I know this is FM related as it happens to me sometimes, particularly when I am really tired. But to tell my colleagues I am not coming in because I feel dizzy and shaky just seems really pathetic! On the sickness phone line
You have to say why you are not in so I just said my fibromyalgia was playing up. Again, seems really Wooly and makes me seem really pathetic. I don't know why I'm worrying, it's not like I have lots of days off, I force myself in no matter what usually!

Just made me think, another example of where this condition makes you feel so silly. I know it's my own issue and probably my colleagues would just think oh hope she's better soon, but I don't know… Just feel pathetic like I said…
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Re: Off work today, but feeling like a fraud!

Postby denys » Wed Jan 07, 2015 2:30 pm

I think this affects quite a few of us on and off, I dont work so not talking about colleagues, but if having a day of collywobbles then its really difficult to explain without feeling a bit foolish. But its real and you genuinely dont feel well so try not to think about it too deeply or you will end up with more time off as we all know, Fibro feeds on stress :-) :-)
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Re: Off work today, but feeling like a fraud!

Postby whoami » Wed Jan 07, 2015 5:23 pm

Hi! When I first had my accident that then triggered fibro I would feel awful guilt for not working any longer, especially on days that I felt good enough to venture out. I saw a psychologist for a while to deal with the feelings.

I now don't think about what others might be thinking. I have learned that I owe no explanation, I do not have to justify my illness.

On days you don't feel well then just call in and say that you are not well. I know in some cases here you need a Dr's note to say you were not able to work. The employer is not allowed to ask why you can't work if you are off for privacy reasons. People just call in and say they are not well and taking a sick day. You should not have to tell them the reason. Is it law in the UK to have to give the reason you are sick?
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Re: Off work today, but feeling like a fraud!

Postby dazzleship » Wed Jan 07, 2015 8:55 pm

hi

I know how you feel I always feel a tad guilty when I have to take a day or two off when I have a really bad flare-up. I just tell work I'm having a flare up and they're fine with that.

Try not to worry about it; if your work hasn't brought it up as an issue then they are probably fine with it. :-)

I don't actually know specifically what the law is here in the UK, I wouldn't have thought there was a law as such. I just know that every place I've worked at has had their own 'sickness policy' which includes things like having to phone your manager/team leader in the morning if you are not coming in, that sort of thing.
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Re: Off work today, but feeling like a fraud!

Postby carolad » Wed Jan 07, 2015 10:07 pm

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Re: Off work today, but feeling like a fraud!

Postby keaedmondson » Wed Jan 07, 2015 11:45 pm

I will have to fill-in form on my return tomorrow. We have to ring everyday unless we know in advance can say we definitely won't be in for three days or something. And we have to say why were off and when will be back. it all gets recorded and written down. And what I write on the form has to match what I said in the message… Like I can remember usually! I had such bad Fibro fog this morning that I nearly forgot to actually ring in at all!
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Re: Off work today, but feeling like a fraud!

Postby carolad » Thu Jan 08, 2015 12:22 am

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Re: Off work today, but feeling like a fraud!

Postby keaedmondson » Thu Jan 08, 2015 12:27 am

No Carol, I am exactly the same as you! I am always at work! I think the only reason I didn't go in today was because I felt so off-balance I wasn't sure I'd be able to walk. Usually I push on and push through guess that's why I have the guilt because it's rare ironically I'm the person in my department with the least time off for sickness…
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Re: Off work today, but feeling like a fraud!

Postby dazzleship » Thu Jan 08, 2015 7:53 am

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Re: Off work today, but feeling like a fraud!

Postby Zia2014 » Thu Jan 08, 2015 12:24 pm

It is not law in the uk that you have to tell your employer but they would expect you to as it's in most policies and therefore you can end up disciplined for it but that's unusual. And in fact it helps employees to do so because if it's fibro there is more onus on the employer to be supportive, so its actually not helpful to not say why.
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Re: Off work today, but feeling like a fraud!

Postby carolad » Thu Jan 08, 2015 4:35 pm

It sounds like a lot of us are guilty of 'presenteeism' ie being at work when we should really be off sick! Aren't our employers lucky to have such dedicated employees? ;-)
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Re: Off work today, but feeling like a fraud!

Postby Zia2014 » Fri Jan 09, 2015 3:03 pm

Sorry for the short reply, just wanted to type it before I forget but I find the tablet really hard to type on!!

I too feel that guilt when calling in, even though when I did so following my flare I couldn't even get out of bed!
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