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The UKFibromyalgia Forums • View topic - erm... my hubbys just walked out on me



erm... my hubbys just walked out on me

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erm... my hubbys just walked out on me

Postby samantha louise » Wed Feb 25, 2009 8:14 pm

oh my god iv been telling you the problems iv been having with him..... now weve just had a screaming argument and he packed a bag and has gone to stop at his mums....

s**t
samantha - louise
and my two little wiggles!
xxx

fuddle off... no,... YOU fuddle off!!
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Postby princess » Wed Feb 25, 2009 8:16 pm

Oh im so sorry - i dont want to say something and upset you any more than you are.
ill pm you

princess




Sent you pm hope you get it
hugs xxxx
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Postby Ivyleaf » Wed Feb 25, 2009 8:48 pm

Oh Sam I'm so sorry hun. There are many reasons why he may have done this i.e. feels inadequate he cannot help you more - can't understand your FM - doesn't or can't cope so has run away basically.

First port of call is your GP. If you've any friends, family contact them - don't sit on your own and try and cope. I'm only new here but already I've seen there are some very wise folk with a great deal of help, advice, contact numbers, places to get help from.

Hang in there kid - we're here for you. All I can do is offer a cyber hug - I wish I could do more.

Hugs sweet

Tricia xxx
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Postby princess » Wed Feb 25, 2009 9:18 pm

I have just pmd her with much the same as above - its bad enough being ill but domestic problems too - we all need to support here eh!

fiona
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Postby auroura » Wed Feb 25, 2009 9:26 pm

Oh love, I am so sorry, deep breathe, let him calm down or whatever it is he thinks hes doing, then try and talk to him. Big hugs.

Sharon
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Postby Mr.A » Wed Feb 25, 2009 9:56 pm

Unlucky, I hate it when people aren't there for you in your time of need.



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Postby cat123 » Thu Feb 26, 2009 1:12 am

sam, we are all here for you,give him time to think,back off a while just,to let him think,Ive been here,twice!! just keep cool.............for now.........cat123
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an update

Postby samantha louise » Thu Feb 26, 2009 10:03 am

just an update, i havnt heard from him since he left although himm mum called me to say he was there.
he has turned his phone off and his mum says he doesnt want to talk to me for the time being he wants to think

i feel like its all my fault
samantha - louise
and my two little wiggles!
xxx

fuddle off... no,... YOU fuddle off!!
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Postby velvet » Thu Feb 26, 2009 10:19 am

its not your fault. you did not choose this. if you had been hit by a car would that have been your fault? if the diagnosis had been MS would that have been your fault?
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Postby mamax9 » Thu Feb 26, 2009 11:20 am

it is not your fault at all...you definitely didn't ask for this disease. He would have expected you to be there to support him if he was ill but can't do the same for you...not much of a man in my book. Take good care of yourself......gentlest fibro hugs
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Postby auroura » Thu Feb 26, 2009 11:51 am

This is NOT your fault, you didnt ask to be ill, none of us did, i dont mean to upset but he should have tried talking before walking. Leave him to it for now, he knows where you are. Gentle hugs, take care.
Sharon

Bad is never good until worse happens
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husband as just walk out

Postby jeannie45 » Thu Feb 26, 2009 2:58 pm

sorry to know about your husband leaving
we are all here for you
take care jeanx :(
just because i have fms ,its still me inside
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Postby Tracy Thomas » Sat Feb 28, 2009 9:11 pm

Hi Samantha, my heart goes out to you and I know how you feel, prior to being diagnosed two months ago my husband and I had the worst year of our relationship. I feel like I've been to hell and back. Trying to talk to him was very difficult as he'd get very defensive, it took a full year to sort things out, he didn't find it easy to talk about what the problem was.

Don't think it your fault for a second, being ill is beyond your control, even though we'd already turned the corner by the time I was diagnosed FM has made our relationship stronger, although I think a lot of that is due to him feeling guilty that the stress of last year is what triggered this illness. Maybe your husband has feelings of guilt that he can't share with you, maybe he just doesn't feel he's able to do enough. Hopefully once he's had some time on his own he will start to talk because that's probably the only way things can improve. It might be worth considering relate counselling, I did look into it, you can locate the nearest one on their website.

Wishing you lots of luck.
Tracy.
I would like to upgrade my body to the pain free model - is it really too much to ask?
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Postby princess » Sat Feb 28, 2009 9:50 pm

I truly think the reason for the domestics is that these guys (not all guys ok) but some of them are happy to be at work and come home to the wife and tea and the telly.
All of a sudden here is the wife in bed, or on settee, unable to do her usual work around the house.
They are used to a strong woman taking charge of things and now well they are just lost..............................................................................but a good man would roll his sleeves up and be sympathetic and come to the Drs with you to find out what he could do to help.
Not walk out!!!!
princess
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Postby hitbyabus » Sun Mar 01, 2009 2:44 am

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