writing abook

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writing abook

Postby unigirl1981 » Mon Feb 15, 2010 10:06 pm

Hi all , i am writing a book finally after a few year of squirriling away bits of info etc. its about disabilities (fms in particular) and its impact on relationships/sex.

its such a major issue that is never really addressed and i feel its time people knew about it!

any comments or suggestions would be appreciated. so far the bare bones of it are:

Relationships
Emotions,
Changes in relationship
work balance,
homelife,
stereo types,
previous roles in relationships,
depression, CASE STUDIES
communication,
trust,
altered images,
carer/noncarer balance,
privacy,
respect,
families,
work,
impotence

Sex CASE STUDIES/PICTURES??????????
• Hetero man
hetero woman
• Gay man
gay woman
• Pain different area,
• body map,
• positions,

• Scheme of book
• Contents
• Relationships
• Sex
• Conclusion
• References/links
Just because you have to park in a blue bay doesn't make you any less of a person!

I am the Chair of Doncaster and District Fibromyalgia Support Group; working with FMAUK and loving it.
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Re: writing abook

Postby smiler22 » Mon Feb 15, 2010 10:45 pm

good idea better you than me. i would nt know when to stop on certain subjects so it would be more than one book. lol

i guess. put in bits from a youner point of view. say like a teenager like lucy thats on here then someone in there thirties then say a bit older like 60. plus.... that way it will cover differnet aspects from someone in school and how they cope to how someone say at work , then someone who is retired .

put in bits of how confusing it is for many of us. how debilitating it is when we have to say sorry to someone when we should of been going out or doing xyz.
also put in how we feel when we have achieved bits and bobs like say someone who has managed to get a promotion in work, or have passed exams etc.

just general. put in bits that are sad how some people feel really down and then put in how people have helped themselves by doing pilates, or by joining a painting group etc.as for the bit about sexual positions etc and how it affects different relationships. i suppose you can put in how it affectess the relationships betweeen families and how you tell your children that mummy/daddy is ill. how you cn explain to your loved one that yes i do still love you, but i cant make love to you tonight etc..
also maybe put in a bit about how say for instance. how some people may feel like no man/woman will ever love them. as they are overwieght, need to use a wheelchair and feel that because there on benfits theyll never want them. etc.y
live life to the full as life is what you make itxx
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Re: writing abook

Postby shazq » Tue Feb 16, 2010 10:23 am

Good luck Mel, let us know when its finished. :clap:
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Re: writing abook

Postby gillshutt » Tue Feb 16, 2010 6:43 pm

Give us a shout if you need any info on anything and we'll all pitch in.
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Re: writing abook

Postby princess » Wed Feb 17, 2010 7:39 pm

I started a book of notes to leave for my children.
It is all about our families and then goes on to before we adopted them, and after with all the details they may need at that stage - more about feelings - i have never let anyone read it as its too personal.
But i will leave it for my daughter to find.
Morbid or what,not just things i feel i have to put down before my mind totally goes with this fb.
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Re: writing abook

Postby unigirl1981 » Thu Feb 18, 2010 9:32 pm

thanks everyone, i will let you know how i go on and ask for ideas if need be!!

i need to find a publisher as i have been talking to a disability group called the outsiders who focus on these issues and they have said they will work with me but its best to get a publisher on side first so thats the next battle i suppose!!!
Just because you have to park in a blue bay doesn't make you any less of a person!

I am the Chair of Doncaster and District Fibromyalgia Support Group; working with FMAUK and loving it.
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Re: writing abook

Postby Mr.A » Sat Feb 20, 2010 7:45 am

You might want to look up a condition called Blue Balls and just try to imagine how painful it would feel when in conjunction with some sort of pain amplification disorder...hmm...say like fibromyalgia.

Ouch! 8)
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Re: writing abook

Postby Mr.A » Sat Feb 20, 2010 7:48 am

Could you write it with characters and a story line so that every day people can relate and maybe (hopefully) even come to understand fibromyalgia? Or will it just be an informational/reference book?
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Re: writing abook

Postby unigirl1981 » Sun Feb 21, 2010 8:43 pm

i am writing the book as an information book but with case studies included so that different scenarios can be looked at to put the theory into "reality".

i am going to be looking for real stories when i have completed more of the book and then i will add them with the contributors permission. hopefully i shall recieve different scenarios for the same "problem" or "aspect" of the condition and then they can be looked at and compared. It will be quite in depth and useful i hope with lots of references and links to others who can help too.

its so much work but i am enjoying it a lot and i am finding some very eye opening information.
Just because you have to park in a blue bay doesn't make you any less of a person!

I am the Chair of Doncaster and District Fibromyalgia Support Group; working with FMAUK and loving it.
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Re: writing abook

Postby tireesix » Tue Feb 23, 2010 7:26 pm

Can you add something about fibromyalgia and vulval vestibulitis/vulvodynia and its affects on sex, pretty please?

Honestly, I am so glad I have such and understanding because he has been quite good about it. I mean, having fibro is bad enough but the excruciating pain from vulval pain conditions that go along with it and not necessarily during sex either. I had pain and discomfort day in and day out (still have the odd bad patch now. I had a really, really, really bad patch where literally all I could do was lie naked on the bed, it was like I had had someone set fire to my bits. I couldn't move, couldn't wear clothes, couldn't do anything except for lie there with my DH getting me cold packs for my nether regions.
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Re: writing abook

Postby shazq » Tue Feb 23, 2010 8:17 pm

tireesix wrote:Can you add something about fibromyalgia and vulval vestibulitis/vulvodynia and its affects on sex, pretty please?

Honestly, I am so glad I have such and understanding because he has been quite good about it. I mean, having fibro is bad enough but the excruciating pain from vulval pain conditions that go along with it and not necessarily during sex either. I had pain and discomfort day in and day out (still have the odd bad patch now. I had a really, really, really bad patch where literally all I could do was lie naked on the bed, it was like I had had someone set fire to my bits. I couldn't move, couldn't wear clothes, couldn't do anything except for lie there with my DH getting me cold packs for my nether regions.


Hi
A fibro friend of mine has this as well, she has been seen by different GP`s and gnyea`s to, she has just been seen by another doc who upped her Ami`s to 75mg a night, it has all cleared up, she could not believe she has had it all this time and just by her upping the Ami`s it has cleared just like that.

I know that some meds work for one and not another but when you get it you will try anything for it to go. :D
Not sure if you are on ami`s or not but maybe ask your gp about it.
As a Public Moderator of this forum my opinions/views expressed are personal and are no more valid than those of other members and not necessarily those of UKFibromyalgia.
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