My friends just been....

Enjoy general conversation with other members

Moderators: perseus, *Lisa*, FluppyPuffy

My friends just been....

Postby lillly » Mon Jan 31, 2011 10:21 pm

Well just had a very odd moment with my friend,we have known each other since school and always have a good old belly laughs together,the problem with laughing so much it bloody drains me now ...how crap is that.
So due to all the fun I was shatterd and felt myself drain in front of her,god knows why but I felt embarrased and a bit out of sorts anyhow I could sense she felt uncomfortable because im strong funny old Lilly who doesnt show her vulnerable side.
So then I go on to tell her my old workmate is having her 40th and I would love to go but feeel it would be difficult what with mobility issues and I do actually feel quite poorly most of the time,you know how nice it would be to just JUMP in the bath shave the legs ,wash and style hair etc,get dressed into something that doesnt resemble a romper suit...well im not that bad but you know what I mean clothes are just for comfort now and Im feeling id love to girly it up again.
Then theres getting there and being at the do..wellyou know where im going with this...Its not happening..poor friend just looked at me as though I was an alien..bless her she doesnt know ..she cant she doesnt have it.
When she left we had a hug and she told me shell take me out in the summer ...so I have got a while to work myself up for it.As I watched her run over the road get in her car and drive away..I am ashamed to say I envied her speed haha.
So does anyone have active social lives and how would you prepare to go to a party etc and how long can you stay,at the moment to me it feels as far away as me climbing everest.
Today I took off my mask in front of my oldest and dearest friend I am Lilly and I have a life changing disability,I dont know how or when or If I will ever have a bounce in my step but I am still me.
Lilly
lillly
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 20
Joined: Thu Dec 23, 2010 7:07 pm

Re: My friends just been....

Postby Nellyphant » Mon Jan 31, 2011 10:45 pm

I went to a 21st party on Saturday 22nd and it took me a week to get over it. I did stay out very late ..................

Jumping in the bath to shave my legs doesn't work for me anymore as my hips are so painful that I can't lift my legs up IYKWIM! I do them in the shower instead! LOL!

I'm the same as you though, jolly old Nic, always making people laugh so it's tough for me to get them to understand too.

:hugs:
User avatar
Nellyphant
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 386
Joined: Wed Dec 15, 2010 10:59 am

Re: My friends just been....

Postby loubie » Mon Jan 31, 2011 11:06 pm

hi :wave:
know just wot you are saying only to well
and it is so so sad :(
i hate this bloody illness, its taken so much away from me
and not getting any better for any of us :(

do as much as you can in the week before the party
have your clothes all ready so you know wot your wearing.
if you have to get a card & prezzie, get that sorted too.
shave legs and any other bits day before.
on the day shower early so you can rest before going out
do it all slowly and you should be ok :hugs:

go and have a great time
you will enjoy it once you are there :hugs: :blowkiss:
loubie xx

As a Public Moderator of this forum my opinions/views expressed are personal and are
no more valid than those of other members and not necessarily those of
UKFibromyalgia.
User avatar
loubie
UKFM Regular
 
Posts: 2491
Joined: Mon Jun 08, 2009 8:57 pm
Location: staffs

Re: My friends just been....

Postby xyz1000 » Tue Feb 01, 2011 12:28 pm

Hello I feel the same as you, my friend was over yesterday and she was
going on about have you been out running? (i use to run alot and be at the gym)
I was like nooooooo I don't think so I can just about manange to get in the bath!
Puzzled look on her face.... "reply oh not nice". It is hard when people are expecting you to
be like you was and thats what you would love more than anything.

I too have been invited my cousin's to a 30th it is at the end of March but has to be paid this week.
its £35 and I have no idea what I am going to be like tomorrow let alone the two months away.
Not sure what to do about that myself. Its difficult to plan anything isn't it.

Great advice though about organizing yourself so you don't have to much to do on the night.
I havn't managed a night out (on the town with the girls) still being in pain . I was at my Mum's Christmas all day and that
went ok just kept popping pills! so I manged to enjoy myself.
Maybe we could encourage each other! When is the do?
xyz1000
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 157
Joined: Fri Jan 14, 2011 3:26 pm

Re: My friends just been....

Postby fabme » Tue Feb 01, 2011 4:17 pm

Social life whats one of those :D mind you I do have a 6yr & 8yr old kids so you're too busy managing their social life to have one of my own :lol: I do miss going out but as I can't go indipendently anymore i've just had to get used to it :(

There's some good advice here though planning getting ready over a few days before and taking plenty of rest as well as not having much on afterwords to recover. One thing you could do if you can tolerate it is get a friend to do your hair for you or a trip to the hairdressers to have your hair done will boost you up as well :fingerscrossed: you can do it and :goodluck2:

fab
As a Public Moderator of this forum my opinions/views expressed are personal and are no more valid than those of other members and not necessarily those of UKFibromyalgia.
User avatar
fabme
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 645
Joined: Mon Jun 22, 2009 10:14 pm

Re: My friends just been....

Postby georgina.hiam » Wed Feb 02, 2011 12:22 am

Hi I know how you feel too ten years ago I was thus active bubbly girl clubbing till all hours and working 59 hour week.
Now I am lucky if I manage to get out to see friends once every six months. Today my friend text me to say she wanted us all to go to see chip n dales celebrate her divorce , I really want to go and support her so I said yes, but it's two months away and I don't know like u guys how I will be tomorrow let alone then.

I so miss joining in having a separate social life to that if my kids, I feel like a part of me has gone, my sister always saying to me why are u not so bubbly anymore they just don't understand.

What I did do tho is got my closest friends and family to read the post one for the non believers, this helped them understand better.

Like u I am going to try rest completely before and spread things across the weeks, goodluck I hope u manage to get there.

Love georgie xxx :goodluck2:
georgina.hiam
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 75
Joined: Sun Jan 16, 2011 12:37 am

Re: My friends just been....

Postby budda » Wed Feb 02, 2011 12:46 am

:goodluck2: :fingerscrossed: that you get there with your friends Georgie. :hugs:
User avatar
budda
UKFM Regular
 
Posts: 2072
Joined: Sun Jan 24, 2010 11:05 pm
Location: glasgow

Re: My friends just been....

Postby denys » Wed Feb 02, 2011 12:52 am

:goodluck1: everyone who has been invited out hope you all manage to get to your do's and have a wonderful time while you are there :wine: :wine: :wine: :wine: :wine: [chocolate] [chocolate] [chocolate] :wave: :wave:
Denys

As a Public Moderator of this forum my opinions/views expressed are personal and are no more valid than those of other members and not necessarily those of UKFibromyalgia.
User avatar
denys
UKFM Veteran
 
Posts: 11901
Joined: Tue Feb 09, 2010 10:05 pm

Re: My friends just been....

Postby Karen27 » Wed Feb 02, 2011 1:41 pm

hi, know exactly where you are coming from. A long standing friend recently said to me did she think my illness was all in my head! If she had seen me two weeks ago she wouldn't have said that, I was in bed for three days couldn't move the right hand side of my body due to the pain and the pain in the left hand side of my face wow! Now on new tablets and pain killers and things have settled down again. I try so hard to keep going keep normal! that people just do not understand unless they are going through what we all are. Take care x
Karen27
UKFM Newbie
 
Posts: 8
Joined: Sat Oct 23, 2010 12:48 pm

Re: My friends just been....

Postby mellabella » Wed Feb 02, 2011 4:04 pm

I was diagnosed in June last year. Since then i have been out socially only twice. Once last September, a charity do, no drink as i drive and. home early. Ended up in bed for three days after it. I tried going out to a friends birthday party again in November as i thought it might have been a coincidence that i ended up in bed for three days when i went out before. I remember it was a cold night, and we walked to three pubs all within close proximity. again no drink but i did stay out until 12 as i was enjoying myself and felt ok. I was fine for about a day and a half after doing this then i was in bed for about a week and a half. The next social event i had, i cancelled as it was too close to Christmas to fit in a flare up! ( now that's pain management) loosing out on a ticket which had cost me £20.

I have decided that there will be no more social life for me.. there's nothing social about fibro and trying to make it fit you instead of you fitting it, is just not worth the after effects.
User avatar
mellabella
UKFM Member
 
Posts: 230
Joined: Thu Jan 27, 2011 10:53 pm

Re: My friends just been....

Postby budda » Wed Feb 02, 2011 4:22 pm

I meet up with my girl friends once a month for dinner, I am due to go tomorrow night, I feel a lot better than i was, since christmas i have not been good, pains everywere, flu, running to the toilet because my IBS had flared up, burnt myself with hotwater bottle on my neck and back, and that was me taking it easy, for ME this can happen anytime, so am going out with my friends and i will enjoy it :fingerscrossed: everything will be alright.
User avatar
budda
UKFM Regular
 
Posts: 2072
Joined: Sun Jan 24, 2010 11:05 pm
Location: glasgow

Re: My friends just been....

Postby denys » Thu Feb 03, 2011 1:31 am

Hope you have a wonderful time Bud :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Denys

As a Public Moderator of this forum my opinions/views expressed are personal and are no more valid than those of other members and not necessarily those of UKFibromyalgia.
User avatar
denys
UKFM Veteran
 
Posts: 11901
Joined: Tue Feb 09, 2010 10:05 pm

Re: My friends just been....

Postby budda » Thu Feb 03, 2011 9:42 am

Thanks denys. :hugs:
User avatar
budda
UKFM Regular
 
Posts: 2072
Joined: Sun Jan 24, 2010 11:05 pm
Location: glasgow


Return to General Topics

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest