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Suicidal Thoughts, A Sensitive Subject To Broach But.....

PostPosted: Sun Feb 20, 2011 9:42 pm
by FluppyPuffy
A lot of us on here battle with depression as a secondary condition, possibly caused by the onset of FM. Most of us, with the help of antidepressants, talking therapies or other therapies we find beneficial, are able to manage the thoughts and feelings depression can stir up. Sadly, this isn’t the case for a few of us.

When we hear, over and over again, that there is no cure, struggle to get some relief from the pain, have to endure inane comments from people that have no understanding of what this illness is, let alone know how it makes you feel, it is very easy to lose the will to carry on and fight.

For some, the only way they can see out of their situation is a permanent, life-ending solution. Sadly, the FM community is not alone in having to face the problem of suicide. Altho there is no specific data about the number of suicides related to FM, there is evidence to suggest that chronic pain and illness can put people at risk of suicide.

The majority of suicides seem to occur at the peak of a depressive episode as the sufferer seems to think there is no other way out of their problem. These thoughts are usually due to a distorted way of thinking, caused by the severe depression and/or the neurological changes associated with FM. With depression, things tend to be seen exactly as they seem at that precise moment in time, but a week or so later, may look completely different.

There is help available for those who feel that ending their life is the only option left to them. There are groups and organisations that will listen without judgement or criticism, and can possibly help with finding an alternative solution to the situation.


You can talk to Samaritans at any time of the day or night.

UK: 08457 90 90 90
ROI: 1850 60 90 90

If you live outside of the UK and ROI, or wish to use a language other than English, please visit to find your nearest helpline.

FMA UK National Helpline

General Fibromyalgia Helpline
Telephone: 0844 887 2444
Fax: 0844 826 9033

Information: Monday to Friday

10.00 am. to 4.00 pm.

This linky takes you to details of Helplines and online resources that may be helpful for anyone who finds that they are having such thoughts, or feel that they may be heading towards them (Thank you very much for sending it mustangmama :blowkiss: :blowkiss: :hugs: :hugs: )

There are warning signs that someone contemplating ending their life might exhibit. These are some of the common ones:-
• Talking or joking about suicide or making statements about being reunited with a deceased loved one
• Making statements about being hopeless, helpless or worthless, or that peoples’ lives would be better off without them
• Preoccupied with death
• Appearing suddenly happier or calmer
• Loss of interest in things that are cared about
• Unusual visits or call to people that are cared about, saying their good-byes
• Giving possessions away, making arrangements or settling their affairs
• Dangerous, self-destructive behaviour such as abusing substances, self injury/mutilation

If someone is showing what are possible warning signs of suicide, there are steps that can be taken to try and help them:-
• Be direct and talk matter-of-factly about suicide. It’s ok to ask them if they feel so badly that they have thought about ending their life. It’s unlikely than an idea will be planted on their head. If someone has been contemplating suicide, they could be relieved and grateful that someone is prepared to be so open and nonjudgmental. Hopefully they will realise that someone does care for them and that they are being taken seriously
• Try not to pass judgment, listen attentively and allow them to express their feelings as well as showing that those feelings are accepted. Avoid getting into a discussion as to whether suicide is right or wrong, or whether feelings are good or bad. Don’t call their bluff or minimise their problems by going on about how they have everything to live for or how hurt their family would be would be. This could add to their feelings of hopelessness and increase the guilt they are feeling. Instead, reassurances need to be made that help is available, what they are feeling is treatable, and that these suicidal feelings are temporary
• Take their thought and/or plans seriously. If someone admits they are thinking about suicide, try to ask them if they have a plan or if they know how and when they might do it. If they are in potentially immediate danger, try to reassure them they are not alone and that there are people who can help them. If necessary, call the emergency services or take them to a crisis centre or A&E
• Never keep a plan for suicide a secret. Don’t worry about upsetting a friendship as this can be fixed
• Offer support if it seems that they aren’t in immediate danger. Tell them they are cared for and it’s apparent that they are hurting. Offer hope that alternatives are available, but try to avoid offering glib reassurances
• Help them look for help and support from individuals and agencies that specialise in crisis intervention and suicide prevention

This is a very delicate and taboo subject to try and broach. Hopefully this will help anyone who is struggling with these thoughts and feelings.

If you know of any individuals or organisations in your areas that deal with such crises, please PM me with their details and I will add them to the list, they may be able to help someone.