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The UKFibromyalgia Forums • View topic - The why's of men



The why's of men

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The why's of men

Postby anne1206 » Tue Jul 14, 2009 2:53 pm

The Why's of Men

1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX?
(because they are plugged into a genius)

2. WHY DON'T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX?
(they don't have enough time)

3. WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG?
(they don't stop to ask directions)

4. WHY DO MEN SNORE WHEN THEY LIE ON THEIR BACKS?
(because their balls fall over their butt-hole and they vapor lock)

(You're laughing, aren't you?!?!)


5. WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS?
(so they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties)

6. WHY DID GOD MAKE MEN BEFORE WOMEN?
(you need a rough draft before you make a final copy)

7. HOW MANY MEN DOES IT TAKE TO PUT A TOILET SEAT DOWN?
(don't know.....it never happened)

( C'mon guys, we laugh at your blonde jokes!)

And the personal favorite:

8. WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH?
(because a vibrator can't mow the lawn)

One for the ladies

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?'
'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?'
He yelled back, ' University of Oklahoma .'

And they say blondes are dumb...
-----------------------------------------------

A couple is lying in bed. The man says,
'I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world.'
The woman replies, 'I'll miss you...'


-----------------------------------------------------------

'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,' Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?'
'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.

-----------------------------------------------

Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor


-----------------------------------------------------------

Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death.
AMEN


----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.
-----------------------------------------------

Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder 'Instruction Manual
durate et vosmet rebus servate secundis///>Carry on and preserve yourselves for better times
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Re: The why's of men

Postby deborah123 » Wed Sep 02, 2009 10:22 pm

lol they were all so funny,gave me a good laugh..esp liked the one about praying to God but not 4 strenght :lol: :grouphug:
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Re: The why's of men

Postby velvet » Wed Sep 02, 2009 11:10 pm

i liked number 4
NEW
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Re: The why's of men

Postby shazq » Thu Sep 03, 2009 11:20 am

:D :clap:
As a Public Moderator of this forum my opinions/views expressed are personal and are no more valid than those of other members and not necessarily those of UKFibromyalgia.
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Re: The why's of men

Postby jeanmoey » Sun Sep 06, 2009 11:10 pm

Sooo funny, thanks for the laugh!! :lol:
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Re: The why's of men

Postby garetjax » Thu Oct 22, 2009 2:13 pm

lmao :clap: liked them all
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Re: The why's of men

Postby bookworm » Sat Nov 21, 2009 11:40 pm

:clap: :clap: I had a chuckle at those - thanks for posting them :lol: :lol: :clap: :clap:
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