feeling sad :(

All your fibromyalgia experiences, questions and answers.

Moderators: perseus, *Lisa*, FluppyPuffy

feeling sad :(

Postby ouchiemama » Thu Jun 20, 2013 4:31 pm

I put a post up a wee while ago about having my atos medical assesment, forgot what I actualy was gonna say about it so doing this 1 aswelll, sorry I feel like Im posting like a maniac!! :crazy:

When I was telling the assessor lady all the stuff about my daily life..I ended up crying my eyes out & feeling so guilty & useless as a mum!! I feel really bad for my kids, my oldest for having to help me out a lot, my youngest for missing out on me being well & doing stuff that I did with the girls when they were younger! :cry: When I was talking about it I thought hmm how bad does this sound hope she wont call social services!! (lol kind of!)

Also feel bad for my mum who works full time & is always round helping me out after work or on her lunch break, I always phone or text her to have a moan, its really not fair on her!! I feel like such a failure!

Also when doing the trying to touch toes I said how you wouldnt think I used to be a gymnast!! I hadnt really thought about that before & it was quite upsetting to think about all the things I used to do!! My party trick is..well WAS doing the splits!!

Sorry ranting on but I feel really down now & really scared that I will be like this forever!! As much as I have told people & the doctor or that its like it just suddenly dawned on me today & I am now feeling very miserable :(

I always trry & look on the brightside & be thankful for what I do have, oalways others worse etc..but right now Im struggling! xx
UKFM Member
Posts: 81
Joined: Wed Mar 20, 2013 5:37 pm

Re: feeling sad :(

Postby masonsbarms » Thu Jun 20, 2013 5:58 pm

hi, sometimes we dont take in how things have become untill we have to go through somthing like a medical or fillilng forms in,

or even telling someone and then bam it hits you hard and i think we have all been where you are now,but you have opend up and admitted how you feel and that it a good thing,

i also say it could be worse ect but dosnt stop me from getting down sometimes it natural,

as for the guilt you are not alone its because we care so much for those we love and i dont think it ever gose away, but if they didnt want to help they wouldnt i have lost contact with friends and family members who i thought were for life but those that realy care and help are still there,

your family kknow you love them and that is all they want they dont want you beating yourself up because you have enough to deal with as it is its not your fault and they know this,

i wrote a letter to myself a while ago when all i kept thinking about was what i couldnt do and told myself all my good points like i can still listen, love support, ect it dosnt always help but i know i am still able to suppot in other ways,

dont be hard on yourself but if your mood dosnt lift talk to your gp about how you are .

and remember we are in this together on this forum and are always here.

takr care xx
UKFM Regular
Posts: 1119
Joined: Wed Dec 28, 2011 8:14 am
Location: preston

Re: feeling sad :(

Postby denys » Fri Jun 21, 2013 1:17 am

It is the time it tends to hit hardest, after having explained everything in detail to someone. As has been suggested if the feeling stays with you then visit your doc, but dont beat yourself up over things you have no control over, I'm sure your little one has fun with you in other ways, maybe colouring a picture or doing a jigsaw together, even just having a cuddle while he reads to you etc.

Do you give the eldest one pocket money for all the tasks she takes on :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: doesnt have to be much (it all adds up :-D :-D )

Hope you get a decent nights sleep and then you might feel a bit better tomorrow :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

As a Public Moderator of this forum my opinions/views expressed are personal and are no more valid than those of other members and not necessarily those of UKFibromyalgia.
User avatar
UKFM Veteran
Posts: 11901
Joined: Tue Feb 09, 2010 10:05 pm

Re: feeling sad :(

Postby ouchiemama » Fri Jun 21, 2013 12:32 pm

Thank you for replies :-D

I was at the doctor today & he was saying its a normal reaction & when I get to the pain clinic the psychologist should be able to help like come to terms with it sorta thing so yes I will try & get my positive side back on the go & not let the guilt, stress, sadness beat me!

Thank you again :-D xxx
UKFM Member
Posts: 81
Joined: Wed Mar 20, 2013 5:37 pm

Re: feeling sad :(

Postby LouLou » Fri Jun 21, 2013 12:52 pm

Hi ouchie

Even though I've had FM for 2 years now and knows of this, I still struggle with those kind of feelings you are having at the moment. It normally hits me when I can't do something I would have done pre FM. Like every year for my OH's birthday we used to always go to Alton Towers as it's quite expensive so we would use it as our treat day lol and we both love roller coasters!

Since having FM from about 2 years ago I haven't been able to go and it does hit you hard. But now we just have people round on special occassions or do a meal out and if my OH wants to still go to theme parks I wouldn't stop him at all.

FM can really change the way you live your life and that takes time to adjust to, I'm still working on that one myself lol. I try and be positive and get on with things but even just last wekend I had a bit of a breakdown because I was just so fed up of the pain all the time. We have this pain 24/7 so I don't think it would be "normal" if we were happy about it lol.

Ouchie I am sure you have many many great qualities about yourself and I'm sure your children love you just the way you are. I too rely on my mum quite a lot with regards to help with doing things round the house or when money is tight her and my dad would give their last penny to help me and my OH. I feel so bad a lot of the time but my mum actually put it into perspective for me. She said that even though I was 30 I was still her child and she felt awful not being able to protect me from the pain, and this was the only way she could help me with this awful illness. I'm sure you're mum is there for you because she wants to be.

Hope this helps a bit and I hope you manage to feel a bit better once you start to talk to the pain clinic/psychologist.
What doesn't kill you will only make you stronger ;-)
User avatar
UKFM Regular
Posts: 1009
Joined: Thu Oct 06, 2011 10:40 am

Re: feeling sad :(

Postby ouchiemama » Fri Jun 21, 2013 1:18 pm

aww thank you lou lou..that actualy brought a tear to my eye.... ok a lot of tears to my eyes..but in a good way!! lol. Thank you :flowers: xx
UKFM Member
Posts: 81
Joined: Wed Mar 20, 2013 5:37 pm

Return to Living with Fibromyalgia

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 11 guests