How to knock you when your down :0(

All your fibromyalgia experiences, questions and answers.

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Re: How to knock you when your down :0(

Postby Di davo » Tue Nov 05, 2013 3:45 pm

Thank you all so much for your replies and info, I will try and contact the ones there to help, just had a voice mail left from my area manager saying she is organising occupational health to come and meet with me, who will asses what I can do and either leave me as I am or arrange shifts for me to return, bit more confused as I have just handed in a note from the doctor stating I am not fit to work, :0(

I wish I was up to letting them know what I think, but all this has knocked me so much, why don't they understand what this does!!!
But I suppose they'd need to be interested in want was wrong with me first, instead of worring about the fact Xmas is coming and it's their busiest time of year!!!!! Good old retail!!

Thank you all again, hope your have good days :0)
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Re: How to knock you when your down :0(

Postby fibro-lu » Tue Nov 05, 2013 5:49 pm


this area manager needs stepping on her toes :nono: :face-slap:

try not to be stressed by her actions

1) don't accept anything not written/forget about "messages left on your phone", what she is doing is very unproffesional, let her know asap in writing, to stop doing such things (involve union rep etc to support you in an email etc)

2) you will receive a letter from an occupational health company; it is more likely that they invite you to go to their office, if you are not well enough to go there, you can let them know and ask for a home visit, you can also ask your HR to rearrange a time suitable to you (ie between 11 and 2)

3) if you decide that you prefere a home visit, the occu doc will come to your house, this doc will not see you at home without someone else (a friend or other trusted person of your choise) there with you as a witness that no fishy things went on, s/he might have a little snoop around and also your appearance is of interest

4) what you discuss with that doc is confidential, at the beginning of the meeting you have to sign that you do agree that s/he can share the info you give, but they rephrase it, you can also ask to be send a copy before it goes to your employer, if there is anything factual wrong (ie wrong name of meds or quantity) you can ask them to alter it but not if it is his/her medical opinion (it was something along that line)

5) you and the occu doc work out a "plan" and s/he will write in his/her report what s/he thinks is the right step forward, this can be anything from "not fit for work for the next x month" to "phased return in such and such way" to "not before such and such adjustments are in place etc , work with him/her

6) as long as you are not well and your gp agrees and signs you off, you will be "not fit for work", when you feel better you and your gp can also come up with a fit note saying ie "phased return under such and such circumstances" or "such and such adjustments"

7) occu doc might suggest to see you again in ie 3 month time for a review, that's absolutely ok

8) your employer pays for the occu doc, so occu doc might be a bit bias (some more than others and some might be a bit arsy) but they are propper proffesionals and won't accept being push by your employer either, and they know that employers like to get rid of people like us, so the occu doc might be of the opinion to give you breathing space from your employer and there henchmen to "recover" more before signing you fit to avoid a relaps, after all occu docs are doctors and they want the best for the patient

9) if you are happy with the occu doc you see at the first appointment, stick to that one and ask particullary for that person to be re-refered to if they send you there again

10) if you absolutely not get on with the one you will see and the report is completely out of the window, you are allowed to have a second opinion

my 1st occu doc was aweful and at the second appointment I had a real gentleman and every new appointment I asked to be seen by him

don't be scared, s/he will ask you a lot of questions to find out what is going on etc in an holistic way to get a good picture
your appointment is about 30 minutes, this will give you enough time to explain things, in your own time and add stuff you forgot etc
good to have your paperwork with you (doc letters etc if you have them) or any other info or "your list" so you don't draw a complete blank :crazy:
be there well in time and try to relax and prepare mentally for the meeting whilst sitting in the waiting area, drink some water, it is not like a noisy busy gp waiting area, pacing is the word, break the whole experience into small junks, one is getting there - one is relaxing there - one is the meeting - and so on
s/he will ask questions relating to your "out of work" life, be honest, if you are like me I try to portrait me like I am much better than I actually am, don't do that :nono:

last advise,
English Standard Version (Bible)
“Behold, I am sending you out as sheep in the midst of wolves, so be wise as serpents and innocent as doves.
taken from

I exhausted myself now
it's a bit lengthy, sorry, I went through it and you will go through it too and get out of the other side
and another :face-slap: for your area manager
all the best :cow-wave: Lu
Mind over Matter: in mind I'm Wonderwoman - in matter, well, - don't mind, doesn't matter
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