How Do We Do It?

All your fibromyalgia experiences, questions and answers.

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How Do We Do It?

Postby Beth1012 » Tue Jun 24, 2014 7:00 pm

Sorry, need to off load.............you know................the kinda day when you just think you can't do this any bloody more? :-?

Think the weather not helping, high pressure but very stormy, thunder, lightning and all.

Now been up since 5 am. Sleep off the charts, chronic fatigue and massive pain levels sending me into OCD. (I'm not diagnosed OCD and mean no disrespect to those who are.......) things get into my head and I have to do them, e.g. irrationally need to buy a new dress (that I don't really need), have to wash the kitchen floor etc even though I know I'll pay for it later...... Can't ask for help because that makes me feel like a failure (and I know I'm not) ;-) ;-)

I know I do these things because I can control them, when I feel I have no control over the Fibro, the pain, the fatigue.............you all know.

Have had to buy special cutlery today because I can't cut my food up, a walking stick with seat thingy because I can't walk far or stand in a que..............(these were other 'OCD' things that HAD to be done)

I feel totally useless...........

Yes I'm still working, part time, but wish I wasn't, on the physical pain / crippling fatigue front, but mentally / cognitively I love my job and I know I'm good at it (I'm a Social Worker with Disabled Children)

What do we do? People ask me how I do it and I reply because I have to, but today I've had a stinking 'nough.... :(

Now I'm just gonna go to bed and cry, and feel very sorry for myself, knowing that tomorrow is another different day... :needhug:

Thanks for bearing my grumblings.............you keep me going x x x :penguin:
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Re: How Do We Do It?

Postby Garyl » Tue Jun 24, 2014 7:12 pm

Beth sound off as much as you want I suffer like you i use a 3 wheeled walker to get around or 2 sticks depending how bad i am, this is the most evil illness there is, i have not slept properly for months. the pain is so bad at times just taken my last daytime pain relief in 3 hrs will be my night time pain relief so i can hopefully sleep a litle.

Keep going best you can Beth thats what i do. gentle hugs
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Re: How Do We Do It?

Postby heather67 » Tue Jun 24, 2014 7:35 pm

Hold in there beth I feel the same but I had to stop working which I'm struggling to come to terms with and this illness gentle hugs xxx
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Re: How Do We Do It?

Postby shadavv » Tue Jun 24, 2014 8:08 pm

I've had to give up working and now I feel lost very depressed can't get out of bed most days feel so useless seeing doctor next week she's great so hopefully she will have some ideas aaarrrrrgggghhhh
Feels good to vent gentle hugs to you all xxxx
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Re: How Do We Do It?

Postby Gilly52 » Wed Jun 25, 2014 12:41 am

Hang on in there Beth, I know just how hard it is for you right now.

I spent my career working in accountancy and finance, loved my job but sadly had to retire way too early because of fibro, have found it very hard to have a life at home every day, this illness is hard to swallow, when a "better day" comes along, there seems to be light at the end of the tunnel.

Thankfully we have this forum to share all our thoughts and worries with each other, which helps so much, and we can share any positive info we may have, or something we have tried and improved from but I think we all need a rant now and again to get things out of our system.

Hope things improve for you soon.

Gentle hugs, Goodnight :sleep: X
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Re: How Do We Do It?

Postby Beth1012 » Wed Jun 25, 2014 8:15 am

Bless You All fairy_dust and I really mean that.

Knowing we have this forum to rant when we need to, with people who genuinely understand is a lifesaver. And it really helps to be able to off load sometimes.

Have had a bit of a better sleep, still stupid amounts of pain, but the sun is shining and am feeling more optimistic today :-D

Wishing you all one of better days

Love & Light & Gentle Hugs x x x x

"Most Days I'm Only As Strong As The Coffee I Drink and The Hairspray I Use!!?" :)
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Re: How Do We Do It?

Postby FluppyPuffy » Wed Jun 25, 2014 8:57 am

Glad to hear things are a little lighter and brighter for you today Beth :bear-dancing: :bear-dancing: :bear-dancing: Sometimes a bit of self pity is what is needed, and a bit of extra :sleep: :sleep: :sleep: :sleep: tends to help a bit too.
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Re: How Do We Do It?

Postby ouchisme » Wed Jun 25, 2014 9:46 am

just :blowkiss: :blowkiss: :blowkiss: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Had symptoms for 5yrs. Dx February 2011
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Re: How Do We Do It?

Postby whoami » Wed Jun 25, 2014 2:53 pm

Beth, I enjoyed reading your post because I read that someone else does what I do. I am OCD. At one time I took meds to control it but now I am trying on my own.

I would scrub the floor...because I had control. It is such a ridiculous thought that you have control but it feels like it. I know I am going to hurt for doing it but that is my choice. Just like things having to be in order, such as flannels in a basket folded one way and put in by colour. I have control of how things look. As simple as it is, those flannels in a neat row, colours separated , such an easy job and who would notice but Me! I would, I have control of how they look and I can manage that.

I would be obsessed on my house being clean. It was an ongoing thing because of the amount I could clean at a time. 10 to 15 min and I would be done. However in that little time the things that would get done would be perfect, bleach spotless, that's another obsession, LOL, I was in control of how clean things were.
At one point I would think the more pills I took the more I could clean. I would take 2 oxcy every 2 hours to scrub a floor. Ha! All I did was create more pain.

Come on here and let all your frustration out. We are here , to if nothing else, listen and understand where you are coming from.
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Re: How Do We Do It?

Postby Beth1012 » Thu Jun 26, 2014 5:04 pm

ouchisme wrote:just :blowkiss: :blowkiss: :blowkiss: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:


Thank You! The kindness of relative strangers is awesome..............And the support it brings really does make a huge difference x x x
:grouphug:

"Most Days I'm Only As Strong As The Coffee I Drink and The Hairspray I Use!!?" :)
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Re: How Do We Do It?

Postby Beth1012 » Thu Jun 26, 2014 5:12 pm

whoami wrote:Beth, I enjoyed reading your post because I read that someone else does what I do. I am OCD. At one time I took meds to control it but now I am trying on my own.

I would scrub the floor...because I had control. It is such a ridiculous thought that you have control but it feels like it. I know I am going to hurt for doing it but that is my choice. Just like things having to be in order, such as flannels in a basket folded one way and put in by colour. I have control of how things look. As simple as it is, those flannels in a neat row, colours separated , such an easy job and who would notice but Me! I would, I have control of how they look and I can manage that.

I would be obsessed on my house being clean. It was an ongoing thing because of the amount I could clean at a time. 10 to 15 min and I would be done. However in that little time the things that would get done would be perfect, bleach spotless, that's another obsession, LOL, I was in control of how clean things were.
At one point I would think the more pills I took the more I could clean. I would take 2 oxcy every 2 hours to scrub a floor. Ha! All I did was create more pain.

Come on here and let all your frustration out. We are here , to if nothing else, listen and understand where you are coming from.


Thank You, and OMG someone else who gets the ridiculous OCD / control / over doing it / then suffering for it thingy! :yikes:

Yesterday, a 'friend' had promised faithfully they'd come & help with chores that I felt I couldn't manage...........garden plants needed pruning, stairs hoovering, kitchen floor washing, car cleaning...............and guess what.............he let me down AGAIN.

So, guess what...............yup I did it all (bar the car) myself, had to, OCD thingy couldn't settle until it was done. :nono:

Consequence, now been up since 4.30 am stupid amounts of pain and M.E off chart.............hey ho Smug Satisfaction! :-?

Thanks for sharing with me. :flowers:
I have nowhere else, or no one else to vent and it REALLY does make a difference.

Bottling it all up just make things worse! :shock:

"Most Days I'm Only As Strong As The Coffee I Drink and The Hairspray I Use!!?" :)
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Re: How Do We Do It?

Postby ouchisme » Fri Jun 27, 2014 9:54 am

you are more than welcome Beth1012

I completely get the having some control over your our lives or our environment whoiam i as our lives don't seem to follow a pattern when leaving with chronic pain. The only thing we can be sure of is the pain.

x
Had symptoms for 5yrs. Dx February 2011
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