I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

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I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

Postby Tel1 » Thu Jul 10, 2014 7:54 pm

Hi all.....

Well as we all know that Fibro seems to get to our inner core at time and there just never seems to be a way out of how we
feel whether it is aches, pains, feeling of being down, depressed, and all those sorts of things... but over the last two days
I have had an overwhelming feeling of SAD, just like some people get in the winter ( although I love the winter ) more than the summer,
which is why people think I am totally mad liking the dark days rather than the summer:)

My rheumatologist told me when I was diagnosed way back, that feeling down and depressed is one of the symptoms of Fibro... although I don't get it * that* often, I am still trying to *somehow* find out if Fibro causes SAD and depression, OR does being like that *cause* Fibro?? I have asked 9 different doctors and consultants over time, and still not one of them can answer me, or give me a proper answer... and that is why I thinkthat a lot of the medical profession think and relate to Fibro as a ( all in the head syndrome. )

However here I am in the middle of having a real depressing time as though I have lost my life and time is ticking by and I am a wasting my life because I can't be how I use to be... It's the same old story, I expect nearly ALL of us could help and advise a newbie with Fibro as we have all been there a hundred times over,, but it never goes away when I get it, and you can still feel very isolated as though you want to take your brain out and wash it and put it back in your head.. :yikes: in hope that it would cure us....

but the rheumatologist told me a long time ago that people with Fibro have slightly different brains!! :yikes: :yikes: in other words it *seems* that we have either ruined our brains through what we are dealing with, or that Fibro is kind of like a body destroyer of like constant unpredictable aching flu tiredness symptoms.... perhaps we will never find out eh....let me know if any of you get like this which I am sure you all must do...but it's nice to hear what others have to say. :( :yikes: what a life isn't it. as no pills to cure us.
Last edited by FluppyPuffy on Fri Jul 11, 2014 12:17 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Made some paragraphs clearer for easier reading.
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Re: I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

Postby humphreys » Thu Jul 10, 2014 8:13 pm

Hi Tel1. I really do feel for you, I've been there many times, but somehow it's got better for me, Mmm should'nt have said that eh!
I go to my rhumatologist every 6mth and everytime he says, well I'll see you in another 6mth, waste of time. But last time I went my usual doctor wasn't there, I saw a Dr from the UK, (I live in the Isle of Man) he was absolutely great. He said there wasn't anything he could do to cure it, but he asked me to lay on the bed tummy down, he gave me the best massage I have ever had, I swore, I laughed, I groaned, but after half hour I felt so great, he said people with Fibro suffer more with depression because of all the pain. He suggested for me to go to a deep intense massage person, not a massure but deep intense, or take up Yoga or Thi shie, I started to do a little yoga, took my time, consentrated, and do you know I do feel better, still looking for a person on the island who does deep intense massage. He also told me to get out more, but I'll do yoga for now. I know we are all different, but we can't sit and wait to get better. I wish you all the luck in the world.
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Re: I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

Postby Beth1012 » Thu Jul 10, 2014 8:16 pm

Oh Bless You

We all have days like that. My belief is that it's the fibro that gets us down, lets face it, it would drag a saint down.

I've long found that weather makes a big difference. I've just got back from Tunisia and the really dry, hot, heat made me feel so much better and in much less pain. Back in Blighty its cold & wet and I'm back to Square One.

Just know you're not alone in feeling rubbish frustrated etc. A good rant does us good :pull-hair:

I wish for you a better day tomorrow

Love & light

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Re: I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

Postby Tel1 » Thu Jul 10, 2014 10:17 pm

Thanks for sharing things...:)) Like I said, I can kind of help people who have their bad days like me as I know what they are
going though, and of course when I get like it, then you feel alone and worried about the outcome of how I am going to get
out of the black hole....but if I see anyone on here that needs advice and help I am there for them,,, :-)
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Re: I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

Postby Andyp » Thu Jul 10, 2014 11:32 pm

Hello Tel1

I found your post very interesting. I also much prefer the dark, so you're not alone there. Your post put into words how I also feel the majority of the time.
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Re: I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

Postby gilld » Fri Jul 11, 2014 8:59 am

Hello. You know it takes a brave person to say how they truly feel. So I want to thank you for giving me the strength to say that is exactly how I feel too. I was diagnosed with psoriatic arthritis and severe depression many years ago...pain and depression link? Had to give up work I loved..head of dept in FE college for students woth disabilities...and abou 18 months ago started having odd symptoms which doctor treated with pills each time I had something else.

I think if anyone has chronic condition you just think 'oh it's part of that' . Next week I see a specialist in Fibro. I live in Spain now, alone after partner beggared off...another story. I can't cope with not knowing what each day will bring...I say 'day' as it seems to start any onld time as I can't sleep normal times. Many days I wake up and first thing I do is cry as I can't move. Anything sets me off. People being nice and away I go. It's like being in mourning for the life and body and state of mind that is dead and gone.

I'm fighting DWP...was on IB and transferred by some psychic ATOS person to ESA WRAG (yes there are some benefits that can be exported to EU). She said I can use crutches...really? Dizzy spells, pain all over, migraines, swollen joints...give it a try stupid woman. So along with depression I get so angry too. When I feel like that I don't go anywhere and end up even more lonely, sad, miserable. It's like a downward spiral...pain affects depression, depression makes pain worse. I hate feeling sorry for myself. All my conversations seem to revolve around my state of health and I fear boring people to death. So thank you if you've got this far with me moaning on...I empathise totally with anyone with this horrible condition. Thanks for listening and being there.
Last edited by FluppyPuffy on Fri Jul 11, 2014 12:20 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Made paragraphs a little clearer for easier reading.
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Re: I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

Postby migrembe » Fri Jul 11, 2014 9:46 am

I had depression for far longer than i have officially had fibro. I find tiredness makes it worse. I find being alone and dwelling on the things i cannot do, does not help,

I have stopped most of the medications, except for basic pain killers, which i take regularly - more pills does not help and for me the side effects made things worse. There is no cure for fibro - simple acceptance of this concept has helped me move my life along.

I think massage works in the same way that rubbing a bruise would - disrupts the message being sent to the brain. Your Dr gave you a massage? Interesting!!

I now meditate twice a day, but then i use to meditate but stopped after i had my accident so beginning again was just picking up where i left off. If you haven't tried it before there may be groups that you can go to, but i wouldn't go to a buddhist center unless you want buddhist teachings as well - not for me thanks! Although i do like their thoughts on a gentle life style. I find meditation stops the 'hum' and 'vibration' that, more of these mean more pain, so less means less pains.

There is no conclusive research that proves that those with fibro have different brains, structure or chemically although those with depression do.

Although i have degree level training in psychology and nursing and nutrition i would say don't believe me but go look things up for yourself.

Hope you get some peace today :grouphug: Beverley

(my blog i write about fibro - i call my pain flares 'Barbie' http://mywonkydonkeylife.wordpress.com/)
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Re: I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

Postby painprincess1 » Fri Jul 11, 2014 11:48 am

Hi tel. I think any nero conditions does the same, were not wired up right lol.
the scary thing is how easy it is to get dx with one thing for years to find out its something else as they all seem to have the same patterns and problems,
have u seem a nero insteed of a rheumatologist .id put money on me having young onset Parkinson's then fibro . still we wait and see in a few weeks. ive been told by the dr that Parkinson's is not all about tremors in fact being stiff sore depressed and slow movement or keys again there's no blood test for it.
all im saying is sometimes a nero is a good idea as must as a rheumatologist .xxx
smiles and the world smiles with you. cry and you cry alone.
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Re: I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

Postby FluppyPuffy » Fri Jul 11, 2014 12:49 pm

migrembe wrote:(my blog i write about fibro - i call my pain flares 'Barbie' )

I call mine Kevin, and he looks like this.....
Evil Kevin Minion.jpg
Evil Kevin Minion.jpg (7.72 KiB) Viewed 2026 times

Unfortunately none of us can be the exact same person we were pre~FM due to the way abilities and limits change. However the essence of who we are is still in us, it may need a bit of digging around to find them, but it is still possible to have some elements shining thru, as well as new ones as we find out how we need to live with FM.

Depression can be a stand~alone illness, as well as manifesting in others who may not have FM, but have other illnesses/conditions. Due to this, from what I have been told, it doesn't tend to be regarded as a symptom of another illness, but rather an associated/co~morbid condition which comes about/develops due to the impact and effects of other problems/illnesses etc.

To try and help yourself, have you thought about looking back thru your previous posts and see what you have said to others who have found themselves in a similarly dark place??? Sometimes adopting the "practice what you preach" approach can help you take that first step or 2 towards a lighter, brighter place. Try looking for something positive in each day, no matter how tiny it may be, and enjoy how it lifts you up a little, even if it is short~lived. The more you try and do this, the easier it will become to spot more of these moments.

There are also free~to~access online resources such as MoodJuice and MoodGYM Self-Help Programs for Mental Health and Wellbeing where cognitive behaviour therapy skills can be learnt to help prevent and/or cope with depression. Maybe working thru something like this could be of benefit. Or there is always your friendly, neighbourhood GP that you can go and see. They may be able to help in some way, such as a Talking Therapies referral and/or additional meds to help things return to a more balanced state.
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Re: I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

Postby *Lisa* » Fri Jul 11, 2014 12:53 pm

:lol: :lol: i love those purple minions :lol: :lol: :lol: just looks how we feel!
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Re: I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

Postby migrembe » Fri Jul 11, 2014 4:39 pm

Fluppypuppy - it is good to know someone is as mad as me and 'Hi' to Kevin welcome aboard.

I think we need to realize that it is okay to be sad sometimes as long as we acknowledge it and then do something about it.
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Re: I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

Postby FluppyPuffy » Fri Jul 11, 2014 6:07 pm

migrembe wrote:Fluppypuppy - it is good to know someone is as mad as me and 'Hi' to Kevin welcome aboard.

Sometimes a little madness is essential to help get thru the FibroDays :crazy: :crazy: :crazy: Kevin is happy to hear that he isn't the only named illness~problem.

Maybe it's something to do with me not wanting to let go of that last element of child~likeness in me, but sometimes giving something a name and persona makes it a bit easier to juggle with :crazy: :crazy: :crazy:
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Re: I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

Postby migrembe » Sat Jul 12, 2014 8:42 am

A friend on my blog wrote - 'interesting how naming something, like our pain, makes it on the one hand, more real, and on the other hand, less all encompassing. What I mean is that it separates it from “me”. So that I am not my pain and yet my pain is very real. Don’t know if I’m expressing this very well.'

She was expressing it perfectly. She also has Fibro but is on a year long tour in Europe with her husband. Anything is possible when we believe it to be so!

Hope Kevin behaves himself this weekend and you have a good one. :flowers:
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Re: I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

Postby Lindilou » Sat Jul 12, 2014 8:53 am

Mine is 'Mogwai' as in The Gremilns, where he starts to change coz he's got all wet.
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Re: I just can't stop feeling ill and sad

Postby FluppyPuffy » Sat Jul 12, 2014 3:02 pm

Lindilou wrote:Mine is 'Mogwai' as in The Gremilns, where he starts to change coz he's got all wet.

I love the Gremlins films, even tho we have them, whenever they are shown on TV I still have to watch them. The Despicable Me films do run them a very, very close second tho. The fart gun scene from the first one has me in fits and tears every time I see it :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
migrembe wrote:'interesting how naming something, like our pain, makes it on the one hand, more real, and on the other hand, less all encompassing. What I mean is that it separates it from “me”. So that I am not my pain and yet my pain is very real. Don’t know if I’m expressing this very well.'

Hope Kevin behaves himself this weekend and you have a good one. :flowers:

I thought it was put very well too. Being able to treat it in this way also shows that there is still some fun left in us, and that we can use it to help ourselves.

I have a cuddly/plushy Kevin, and when I last went for an assessment/review of how I was going on, I took him with me. The looks on some peoples faces when I explained what he represented were priceless. One of those classic, norty moments when you leave someone wondering if you're being serious or not :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Kevin is pretty quiet so far :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed: I hope Barbie is being a little lady rather than a proper little madam, and that Mogwai is staying dry so far :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed: :fingerscrossed:
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