Denial?

All your fibromyalgia experiences, questions and answers.

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Re: Denial?

Postby SchroedingersCat » Tue Jul 29, 2014 11:15 am

I was fairly sure I had FM before I got the diagnosis, so it was no surprise and I knew what to expect - the only thing I am in denial about is whether I'm going to let it rule my life. It won't.
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Re: Denial?

Postby painprincess1 » Wed Jul 30, 2014 12:18 pm

Yes and still do after all these years.im still waiting and hoping it something else treatable .
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Re: Denial?

Postby FluppyPuffy » Wed Jul 30, 2014 1:03 pm

I'm reluctantly resigned to my life with Kevin these days. I can't say I've truly accepted things, but try to keep an uneasy truce between the 2 of us as much as I can. I know what my abilities and limits are, and try to work with, rather than fighting against them, altho it doesn't always turn out like I'd prefer.

I spent a lot of years in denial, trying to ignore things that were changing, not really saying anything to anyone, incl OH, GPs and specialists, as doing so would mean I had to acknowledge that there was wrong and what was happening to me. I could have been told it was called anything and I think I would have reacted in the very same way.

Looking back, with just how far down it had dragged me, if I were to find myself in a similar situation again, I think I'd be more open/receptive to what was happening to me, and hopefully find my way thru to the other side in a slightly easier way than I did previously.
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Re: Denial?

Postby Zia2014 » Wed Jul 30, 2014 1:20 pm

As I have no diagnosis yet I also keep wondering if it might be something else - and tbh I kind of hope it is something that is 'treatable'. I have been back and forth and all over the place, especially when all the doctors say different things.

I also am not bed-ridden and capable of doing things, although usually my exhaustion/stiffness/pain tell me I'm not right. But as my OH doctor mentioned about hypochondria, I do occasionally wonder if it is all in my head. Of course then I start feeling boiling hot when it's cold and remember there is something wrong with me...
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Re: Denial?

Postby Tally1068 » Thu Jul 31, 2014 9:42 am

That's the worst, The years it takes to get a diagnosis. In my case nearly 4 years.

I was pleased when they finally said fibromyalgia because every previous Rheumatology visit made me feel like a hypochondriac and many a time I'd burst into tears after seeing yet another young Consultant who hadn't a clue why my steroid use was so long, over 50 years.

I don't think they had a clue what little treatment there was back in the sixties for chronic asthma, no steroid inhalers and definitely no nebulisers. Steroids saved my life at 18, but I'm now paying the price of all the side effects.

I don't know if they contributed to the fibro, they certainly suppress your immune system, but they've definitely contributed to my being wheelchair and housebound because severe osteoporosis(a major side effect of steroid use) means spinal fractures, which they wont operate for (originally they were going to put a rod in my back) because of the state of my bones.

So you adapt yet again. At least I don't have my GP telling me as he did for years when I asked what was wrong with me, that he didn't know......so frustrating. I read everything I can about it as I'd never heard of it before and thank my lucky stars that I'm not younger and missing out on a pretty satisfying life and career. I've done that even though it was prematurely cut off due to me not being able to cope anymore.

I truly don't know how I'd have reacted if I'd been in my 20's or 30's. My heart goes out to all those suffering in what should be the prime of your life :( Having to cope with the stress of work would finish me off mentally, I think.

:sick: There are perks to being disabled though, I don't have to cook, clean or iron and I get the best seats at the theatre (even though I have to cancel so many times). And Carers who take over the main task of running the house.

:lol:
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Re: Denial?

Postby lizzyKB » Thu Jul 31, 2014 10:01 am

I'm pleased you have raised this, as I was going to post a similar question myself. The discussions here have been helpful and it's reassuring to see that there are different levels of this condition, something that has always concerned me as I am not that bad with it.

My problem is that I really don't trust the diagnosis and I am convinced that I have got something else (usually the big C). I've had mild fibro symptoms for over two years and when I was in the UK the Drs told me I had 'health anxiety' as it was not possible to have pains that moved about the body - one had never heard of costochondritis which is how it started. I was given beta-blockers for the HA and high blood pressure which I still take.

When I moved to France a year ago I went to the Doc's and got a much better reception. After a few blood tests to rule out thyroid and some prodding and poking Fibro was diagnosed. I've been back a few times with pains in different places but all are put down to the Fibro. The trouble is I am still affected by the HA - constantly worried that it is something else and that there has been insufficient investigation.

Does anyone else have this problem, how do you deal with it?
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Re: Denial?

Postby carolad » Thu Jul 31, 2014 1:42 pm

lizzyKB wrote:I'm pleased you have raised this, as I was going to post a similar question myself. The discussions here have been helpful and it's reassuring to see that there are different levels of this condition, something that has always concerned me as I am not that bad with it.

My problem is that I really don't trust the diagnosis and I am convinced that I have got something else (usually the big C). I've had mild fibro symptoms for over two years and when I was in the UK the Drs told me I had 'health anxiety' as it was not possible to have pains that moved about the body - one had never heard of costochondritis which is how it started. I was given beta-blockers for the HA and high blood pressure which I still take.

When I moved to France a year ago I went to the Doc's and got a much better reception. After a few blood tests to rule out thyroid and some prodding and poking Fibro was diagnosed. I've been back a few times with pains in different places but all are put down to the Fibro. The trouble is I am still affected by the HA - constantly worried that it is something else and that there has been insufficient investigation.

Does anyone else have this problem, how do you deal with it?


I don't trust my diagnosis either. I have very little faith in doctors to be honest and I think they sometimes palm people off with a label, just to shut them up and get rid of them! But unlike you, I'm not worried about it. With me, it is more a case of thinking there is something about my lifestyle or diet that is affecting me so I'm just going my own way and seeing what I can do to help myself.

If you are worried about your health, this isn't going to help your symptoms....stress causes all sorts of physical symptoms. I wonder would it be worth trying something like cognitive behaviour therapy to try and control the anxiety? I've never had it myself but I've heard of people who have had great results from it.
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Re: Denial?

Postby lizzyKB » Fri Aug 01, 2014 10:22 am

Thanks Carolad - I agree re the Drs, in the UK I was made to feel that I was a nuisance complaining about something that did not exist or that it was all in my head. It's different here in France, they seem to know more about fibro and accept it is real. I also wonder, in my more realistic moments, if is due to lifestyle/age factors - pre-menopause and sitting in front of a computer screen all day.

I have considered CBT for the HA. I've read some really helpful books on managing anxiety and for a while I have been OK. Its just this last week I had a flare-up and although I could list all the symptoms and see that they are all on the list on fibro symptoms, I can't stop thinking they could also be something else.

I'm feeling better today, so I think joining the forum and posting here has helped. Also, husband who previously discounted my 'middle aged women's madness' as nothing has realised that he needs to be more supportive. The funny thing is I never thought I had the 'fibro fog' until he told me that he always knows when there is something wrong with me as I act as if my brain is made of mush.
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Re: Denial?

Postby carolad » Fri Aug 01, 2014 11:43 am

lizzyKB wrote:Thanks Carolad - I agree re the Drs, in the UK I was made to feel that I was a nuisance complaining about something that did not exist or that it was all in my head. It's different here in France, they seem to know more about fibro and accept it is real. I also wonder, in my more realistic moments, if is due to lifestyle/age factors - pre-menopause and sitting in front of a computer screen all day.

I have considered CBT for the HA. I've read some really helpful books on managing anxiety and for a while I have been OK. Its just this last week I had a flare-up and although I could list all the symptoms and see that they are all on the list on fibro symptoms, I can't stop thinking they could also be something else.

I'm feeling better today, so I think joining the forum and posting here has helped. Also, husband who previously discounted my 'middle aged women's madness' as nothing has realised that he needs to be more supportive. The funny thing is I never thought I had the 'fibro fog' until he told me that he always knows when there is something wrong with me as I act as if my brain is made of mush.


I'm glad your hubby is being more supportive - it makes such a difference when you have the support of people close to you :) x
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Re: Denial?

Postby Tally1068 » Fri Aug 01, 2014 12:18 pm

Amen to that.

I don't have anyone close (divorced long ago) but, just after I broke my back I had one locum ask me "who do you blame for being a junkie?" when he looked at all my meds.
If I hadn't been in excrutiating pain I'd have socked him one. It reduced me to tears and even makes me so angry to this day. I hadn't the energy to complain back then. I wish I had. What doctor says that?

Being believed is essential to getting to grips with our condition IMO.
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