Single Mum struggling with fatigue

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Single Mum struggling with fatigue

Postby mrsmoomoo » Wed Jul 08, 2015 7:39 pm

I've not been on here for a while and had forgotten how informative and friendly this forum is.
Diagnosed with fibro 3 years ago and I'm undergoing tests for SLE at the moment. I've lived with pain for 10 years which started in my back and is now widespread but I'm really struggling with fatigue at the moment and all I do is sleep and work (part time). I can't manage a full time job I have 2 teenage sons who help a bit but oniy as much as any teenager!!. I'm 45 but young at heart but feel like I've an old body, it's been 6 months since my last flare and this one has knocked me for six. My house is never tidy as I struggle to keep up. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to help with fatigue, I would appreciate any help :-) :-) :-)
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Re: Single Mum struggling with fatigue

Postby sheen » Wed Jul 08, 2015 11:10 pm

Hi, you didn't mention their ages? I'm in very similar situation, my two are 14 and 12. I contacted the school and went into see the student health and well-being officer(I can't remember her title). I then contacted MIND as suffer from depression anxiety stress. They advised I contact social services. I did all of that, kids now have support worker too. But they assessed me and decided to get me carers. I now have them for an hour in the morning, and an hour at end of school. They take kids to school for me too. I know it's hard to accept all of these things, God it made me feel old. But the point is, I get help. It takes pressure of me and the girls.... Maybe worthwhile doing the same. Sorry for long post but felt it necessary to let u know, ur not alone, there is help out there. Don't be to proud to accept it. It's truly made a huge difference, I hope this helps in some way. Good luck. X
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Re: Single Mum struggling with fatigue

Postby mrsmoomoo » Thu Jul 09, 2015 12:16 am

Thank you for replying. My son's are 13 and 17, my eldest will wash up and take my labrador out for walks every day and does the shopping for me but my 13 year old just doesn't get how ill I'm feeling. I will see if they're are any support groups near where I live and discuss with the Dr when I go back next week for my blood test results. I've had positive blood results for rheumatoid arthritis but as I don't have the " classic" symptoms he won't refer me so I'm now being tested for lupus. Life is hard on your own but my kids and my dog make it all worthwhile. Thanks for the advice and keep well xxx
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Re: Single Mum struggling with fatigue

Postby bandj » Sun Jul 12, 2015 12:29 pm

Hi, I'm sorry that I don't have any ideas for the fatigue but I wanted to reassure you that you're not alone. Today I went back to bed after breakfast and slept for two and a half hours. I still feel shattered but our son is coming for lunch so I'd better try and stay awake!! I'm only making chicken sweet and sour so it's a simple lunch and I've cheated and bought his favourite cheesecake! Even Lukey (our dog) looks worn out but it's the heat that's affecting him.
the only medical advice I've been given is to pace myself. Which isn't easy when you're working and a carer for hubby who has multiple health conditions. I try and pace myself but it doesn't usually work out that way.
There are these three things that remain: faith, hope and love. And the greatest of these is LOVE.
1 Corinthians 13:13
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Re: Single Mum struggling with fatigue

Postby clairbear » Mon Jul 13, 2015 2:18 am

Hey hun,

Your doing a great job holding up a house, work, kids with fibro, don't be hard on yourself.
What sheen and Bandj mentioned is right, pace yourself, seek help and don't be too proud. if you can get help, accept it, it might give you a little of your life back away from work and sleep!

I spoke to an excellent Rheumatoid consultant last week who has studied and has papers he's written into Fibro and other rheumatoid conditions. His advise to me was to get my sleep sorted to help with my complete exhaustion and fatigue.
My original Consultant had suggested a trip to the sleep clinic but no one took him seriously and then my support group talked a lot about sleep and nothing came of my suggestions to my GP. He said many people with fibro miss stages of restorative sleep, which is why many of us wake up feeling worse than when we went to bed (or like me went to up..went to up lol)
He's given me a combination of medicines to talk to my GP about and a strong suggestion that the sleep clinic is done, in case something else is preventing my sleep (I have asthma which is worse at night so it could be an airway obstruction).

Have a word with your care team about tackling the fatigue, tell them how damaging it is being to your home life and see if you can push them into looking into options available to you.

On another note (sorry I don't mean to go on) Sheen mentioned talking to the school about your boys. I worked in a school for many years and can say that the support systems set up in schools is far better than it ever was in our days. Don't be afraid to talk to them about your conditions and how it effects home, the boys etc.. They may be able to help, or put you in touch with someone who can.
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Re: Single Mum struggling with fatigue

Postby z200 » Tue Jul 28, 2015 7:35 am

Another single mum here with a 9 & 7 year old... It's hard work, especially now the summer holidays are here... But we must plod on.
Keep positive. You're lucky they are teenagers. They can start to do more responsible chores for you :)
I, too, often go back to bed for the pointless sleeping. My girls understand- watch a dvd, or play quietly down stairs... Wake me when they are hungry lol :) keep positive. It'll all be fine.

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