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The UKFibromyalgia Forums • View topic - Dad



Dad

Moderators: perseus, *Lisa*, FluppyPuffy

Dad

Postby Persephane » Fri Jan 06, 2012 8:34 pm

This is my story of courage and strength, when i hear someone say whats the point or life is over, i offer this story, it means a lot to me so i hope you like it. This is the first time ive given anyone the long version.

My Father (Roy) was born in 1930, a handsome young man he had an active life, he loved Motor bikes, cars,photography and could put his hand to any job. His national service was completed in the R.A.F and he became a proffesional photographer.

At the age of 22 he had an accident and came off his motor bike, The Drs thought something didnt seem right so started to look into his health, which was deteriorating. He was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis, which has many similarities to FM.

His health continued to deteriorate and he was hospitalised on a ward with 4 other Multiple Sclerosis patients. He became unable to do anything for himself, he weighed 4 stone and spent his time in a wheel chair, unable to even feed himself.

The highlight was visits from a girl (Joyce) who had fallen for him, before the illness took over.

At the age of 24 the Dr's said he had less than 5 years to live.

The young girl had so much hope and strength, she pushed him to leave hospital and to stop taking all the tablets which included arsenic, she didnt give up and over the next 2 years she helped to get him on his feet and build him up.

In 1956 they got Married, but were told that children would be impossible for either of them. Joyce worked but Roy could'nt so the council wouldnt let them have a house,and no bank would give a mortgage o a woman. They saved every shilling, begged and borrowed until they could buy the cottage.

The cottage was a derelect old place, (we managed to date it back to the 14 centry) they borrowed an old caravan as the cottage wasnt habitable, they did favours and swops, for help and materials and over the next 30 years they built it back into a lovely home.

He had a few jobs RAC, Photographer, Securicor, Kleeneze but his lack of mobility his failing hearing and illness kept pushing him to find something better.

He gave up the jobs bought some lawn mowers and an old van and became a grass cutter, he built up his own buisness and his own strength, all the walking got him fit.

Now i said neither of them should of been able to have kids, well they didnt give up with that either, Joyce had 8 miscarrages, and 4 lovely kids, the boys learnt to sew, mend clothes, cook and help rebuild the house, the girls bricklaying, putting in sewerage pipes, replacing roofs etc.

Time for my thoughts now. I remember growing up knowing Dad could die any time, we helped him, we looked after him when he was ill and we worked hard to build a home with out money.

He was nearly always smilling, humming or singing, not a great voice but it didnt matter, people thought he was drunk because he couldnt stand still, we said hes just dancing.

11 years ago they gave up the cottage and moved to a house with 2 acres of land and several outbuildings.
It was amazing he could put his hand to anything, re building properties, woodwork, metal work, he made all us kids feel lazy, he was so active we couldnt keep up. One amazing man,with one amazing woman beside him. he knew if he sat down the illness would take over, so he lived every day to the full.

A year ago next friday he suddenly passed away, no warning 80 years old, He had a very hard life but not giving up, smilling and fighting for his future gave him the most wonderfull life, he touched so many hearts, hopefully his story will give others the courage to look past there illnesses.

Five days after he died i got my FM diagnosis, no time to greave for either lives.

Gill :needhug:
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Re: Dad

Postby denys » Fri Jan 06, 2012 8:50 pm

Wonderful story Gill, with loads of hope and encouragement :hugs:
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Re: Dad

Postby FluppyPuffy » Fri Jan 06, 2012 9:18 pm

My screen has gone blurry reading that Gill :cry:


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Re: Dad

Postby Persephane » Fri Jan 06, 2012 9:34 pm

Took me several hrs, a pile of tissues and a towel for the keyboard, the short verbal version is a lot easier to deal with.

Gill xx
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Re: Dad

Postby shazq » Sat Jan 07, 2012 1:29 pm

Lovely story. :hugs:
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Re: Dad

Postby Persephane » Sat Jan 07, 2012 1:53 pm

The 4 other MS patients he met in the hospital, did'nt leave. They rested, took the drugs and underwent coutless tests, and they had all passed away before my Dad walked down the isle.

So i can't just sit and give up, I have no right to say my life is as tough as his was.

Every photo I have of him he is pulling a funny face, so i will smile, get up have fun and enjoy life, and encourage you all to keep fighting.

Gillxx
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Re: Dad

Postby denys » Sat Jan 07, 2012 6:12 pm

And so we will Gill as life is too precious to waste :hugs:
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