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The UKFibromyalgia Forums • View topic - New here in fairly desperate need of helpand advice!!



New here in fairly desperate need of helpand advice!!

Introduce yourself and find fellow sufferers in your area or who share the same interests.

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New here in fairly desperate need of helpand advice!!

Postby ratcher » Tue Jul 10, 2012 7:06 pm

Hi all

I've just joined this forum and naturally I'd like to introduce myself in a positive and interesting way, but I feel as if it will just come out as one big moan !!

For the last 3 years I have been suffering with lots of symptoms which seem to get worse but I do have better days/weeks and then impossible days/weeks.

Started with pain in my neck and back and then my shoulders, then sleep became a stranger, I felt as if I was trying to go to sleep standing up as all my muscles were still being used somehow... even though I was laying down. The pain spread to my hips and shins and knees and elbows and now my hands and feet, its taken 3 years to gradually spread and the headaches and confusion are constant. lots of restless leg problems along with agony in my jaw and teeth clenching - insomnia is a killer.

I have seen my GP, several times, he says "get on with it" he tells me I am healthy, he tells me I am depressed, he tells me I have three small boys what do I expect... I tell him I'm happy and I want to go back to work, I tell him I'm in pain and not depressed but he sees me as a pill seeker or an anxious woman who needs beta blockers!! :-x

He simply won't help me. I am in pain everywhere and its all the time. My vision is playing up now. I don't sleep, I can't think - I am 39. I love my life, my husband and my kids, I exercise and I am fit - I am exhausted, how can I work and care for my kids I ask him? :(

well thats my moan over, but I need advice, I hope to learn and be able to give back advice. The only things that help are deep massage (hurts but helps) strong pain killers, hot baths and diazepam <not prescribed by GP as he thinks I will get addicted, I borrowed them from a pal> - SO my lie is as bad as it has ever been and GP tells me there is nothing to be done that its all in my head.... what is a person to do???
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Re: New here in fairly desperate need of helpand advice!!

Postby masonsbarms » Tue Jul 10, 2012 7:25 pm

hi ratcher, sorry you are not getting any help,

you realy need to change your dr keep looking untill you find one who is simpathetic and knows something about fm.

make demands and complain if you have to.

this is hard to deal with but with the right help it is possible for some of us to work.

i would not recomend borowing pills of your friends as they could cause more problems.

things can get a bit better and brighter when you have the right treatment.

take care xx
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Re: New here in fairly desperate need of helpand advice!!

Postby ratcher » Tue Jul 10, 2012 8:00 pm

Thank you. I saw a rheumatolagist about 2.5 years ago - I only had back pain then. He wrote to my Gp recommending he prescribe diazepam. Gp still refuses. I only borrowed the pills as a proper doctor had said I need them. I loathe taking drugs, I'm into organic, healthy living and it is out of desperation that I take the meds. Laying awake in hideous pain every night and trying to be mum to boys aged 3, 6 and 8 the next day is getting harder and harder. I sometimes fear I simply cannot look after them - simple tasks feel impossible.
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Re: New here in fairly desperate need of helpand advice!!

Postby FluppyPuffy » Tue Jul 10, 2012 8:18 pm

:welcome: to the forum ratcher :wave: :wave:

Sadly what you're experiencing in trying to find the reason for your various symptoms is one that a lot of us have also gone thru. All I can really do is echo what MasonsBarms has said, see a different GP, explain everything to them and see what their response is. If it's a similar one to what you've already had, then keep trying different ones. If you've seen them all at your surgery, then you may need to consider changing surgeries to try and fins a helpful and understanding GP.

I'm also with MB when it comes to taking meds that have been prescribed for someone else. Doing so could cause you more problems with potential reactions/interactions. I'm aware you'll have probably been desperate when you did it, and prepared to try anything to bring you even a little relief, but even if you were originally prescribed them a while ago, things can change with possible unpleasant effects.

Being a mum with FM is difficult, but you can still be the best mummy you can be to them. You need to find the right amount of activities and length of time to do things with them, both collectively and individually. I first started with FM when my son was a toddler, so all he has known is me as I am, all FMified. He's a teenager now and just sat his GCSEs, and not being able to do all the things I wanted to do with him, altho upsetting at the time, doesn't seem to have a negative effect on him, so there is hope, you need to find the right balance of things for you.

There's lots of info and advice on here, covering all sorts of subjects, so have a look and a read around, you may come across some useful ideas.

Anything you're wanting to know about, just ask and we'll try to help you with it :bear-dancing: :bear-dancing: :bear-dancing:


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Re: New here in fairly desperate need of helpand advice!!

Postby cherrybee » Tue Jul 10, 2012 10:44 pm

Hi ratcher and welcome...I agree, you really do need to change GP and get
some help, theres nothing wrong with getting a second opinion and your
GP obviously has a mental block when it comes to helping you. It's
exhausting enough having children of those ages..(I remember, I had
4 ) good luck, and hope you get the help you need
:fingerscrossed:
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Re: New here in fairly desperate need of helpand advice!!

Postby TATT » Wed Jul 11, 2012 12:03 am

Hi Ratcher,

Welcome to the forum, sorry about your pain but your in good company here.

I look forward to chatting with you soon.

Take care. Tatt
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Re: New here in fairly desperate need of helpand advice!!

Postby ratcher » Wed Jul 11, 2012 10:34 am

Thank you for replying. I feel a little more positive already. I will post in other threads once I find my way around of course, but wondered if anyone else gets 'flare UPS'? During stressful times and menstruation and when they've overdone it on a particular day? I have a good 'window' of 9am to 2pm some days but others are grim from start to finish (except they don't finish because sleep doesn't come!).

Definately going to see s different Gp.
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Re: New here in fairly desperate need of helpand advice!!

Postby samanthal » Wed Jul 11, 2012 12:58 pm

Hi Ratcher :-)

I am also new to the site. I joined yesterday :-) It's nice to have a site where people understand isnt it and can 'talk the same language as us'.

Your story and symptoms sound very similar to mine ( as it will to lots of others here). I am sorry that you are in so much pain :( I totally sympathise!

I think the guys are right about changing your doctor. Particularly if you have been diagnosed with FM. As we know, it is a real condition/illness/whatever we want to call it and it does need supportive treatment. You definately need a doctor who is in the 'know' about FM or at least 'open' to the idea of it and who ideally knows something about it so that they can offer you the right pain management. Please don't stay with that doctor any longer - you have a right to a better doctor.

I hate it that doctors are so happy and quick to suggest depression! As I said to my consultant.... if you felt the pain that I feel every day.... and had it change your life pretty radically.. you too would be depressed. I maintained that if I was depressed.. then it was as a direct cause of having the illness rather than 'the cause'.

It hurts to hear of someone around our age who loves life and her children and who is being let down by the system. If they could manage your pain and condition properly... then you would be able to look after your children much more along the lines you want to and be a happier partner. I am not the happiest partner when in a relapse lol and I feel so guilty about that. I also share your guilt about not being the mother I would like to be to my six year old daughter... i have to leave all the active stuff for her to do at school and with others and she and I lead a quieter, simpler existence. But we still love each others company and enjoy reading, colouring, watching movies, playing scrabble, playing games on the computer, homework, talking etc. I think as long as we are there for our kids- loving them and showing them attention in some form... then thats all that matters. Don't give yourself a hard time. It will be much easier for you once you are getting the medical support you need :-)

I hope you have a good day and that your pain eases a little.

S x
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Re: New here in fairly desperate need of helpand advice!!

Postby FluppyPuffy » Wed Jul 11, 2012 2:29 pm



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Re: New here in fairly desperate need of helpand advice!!

Postby shazq » Wed Jul 11, 2012 3:00 pm

:welcome: to the forum racher :wave:
As a Public Moderator of this forum my opinions/views expressed are personal and are no more valid than those of other members and not necessarily those of UKFibromyalgia.
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