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The UKFibromyalgia Forums • View topic - Despair, anger - newly diagnosed and feel alone!



Despair, anger - newly diagnosed and feel alone!

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Despair, anger - newly diagnosed and feel alone!

Postby TraceyGM » Tue Apr 19, 2011 10:22 am


Hi all,
Well where do I start?
After a couple of years of pain and increasing fatigue; seeing several non helpful doctors I finally find a GP who listened and after bloods and X-rays I was sent to a consultant who diagnosed fibromyalgia. This was a couple of weeks ago now and since then I have become increasingly worse. I am now off work as I cannot function both physically or mentally. My whole body hurts, it feels like flu x100. I also have depression and whilst this was under control and I was at the point of reducing my meds I feel I have done a complete U turn.

I have tried to explain to people how it effects me, how stupid it feels to say to someone you can't even open a tin of beans or peel potatoes because of the pain in my wrists! Or that I cannot even play with my son or take the dogs for a walk, simple pleasures in life!

I was on Tramadol but whilst it helped with pain, it also made me into a Zombie, tired (nearly fell asleep driving) and thoughts of suicide and self harm, paranoia etc. I have come off these now and have a GP appointment tomorrow to discuss what options I have.

I go from periods of anger :swear1: to complete dispair :( that this illness can have such a profound effect yet so little known about it medically or socially. Whilst I have had depression on and off through life I laugh because people cringe in embarrassment when I talk openly about it with humour because it is still a big taboo however I find it hard to talk about this as little is known and people think it is all in your head.

It feels a lonely place at the moment but I take my hat off to this forum, it is a God send however I hope that whilst it will help me to understand it more, I wish society in general would understand more.

Thanks for reading, it feels good to get this off my chest and I may even ask my partner to read it to try and understand.
:needhug:
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Re: Despair, anger - newly diagnosed and feel alone!

Postby FluppyPuffy » Tue Apr 19, 2011 12:04 pm

:wave: Tracy :welcome: to the forum. Here are a few :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: to start things off as well as [chocolate] [chocolate] [chocolate] [chocolate] [chocolate] and :wine: :wine: :wine: :wine: :wine: as they're guilt free on here and always make things better :clap: :clap: :clap:

You're not on your own now you've find us, we're here to help and support each other with how this wretched illness affects us. What you're going thru at the moment is pretty typical of what happens after dx. You get all these thoughts and feelings swirling round because, even tho you have a name for what is happening to you, the realisation of it hits you. Things will settle down with time, it's unfortunately a bit of a waiting game for that part tho. We all seem to go thru similar stages, anger/frustration, denial, complete despair with occasional visits back to the other stages, then eventually a grudging acceptance. When you get to accepting, then you realise you an have a life with FM, albeit one that you probably never anticipated or expected.

Here's a linky to the meds used to help with FM, there might be something useful on there for you. Go thru the various options with you wonderful-sounding GP and see what might be suitable for you
It's a case of trial and error to find what makes a difference to you as we often find that what suits one of us may not be for another :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:

There are some things on here to help those close to us understand about a bit more about FM. Try showing your OH The spoon theory and One for the non-believers to see if they help.

Think I've waffled on enough for now. Have a look round at what there is on her, and anything you want to know, just ask and we'll try to help you with it.

PS I deal with the depression side of things in a similar way you've described, and I have to admit I get a little pleasure at seeing some of the uncomfortable looks from people when talking about such a taboo. But then again I an still be just a little bit norty :lol: :lol: :lol:


If your dog doesn't like someone, then you probably shouldn't either
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Re: Despair, anger - newly diagnosed and feel alone!

Postby TraceyGM » Tue Apr 19, 2011 12:22 pm

Thank you so much for your reply and after a few tears I feel a little relief

Oh and I agree with your quote ' If your dog doesn't like someone, then you probably shouldn't either' although my black Lab thinks everyone who visits the house is to see him and only him, whilst the highly strung Collie herds the Lab by nipping his legs then throws a ball at your feet!!

Thanks again
Kind regards

Tracey

:)
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Re: Despair, anger - newly diagnosed and feel alone!

Postby FluppyPuffy » Tue Apr 19, 2011 12:26 pm

With your bonkers-sounding doglets, you'll have a :crazy: :crazy: :crazy: :crazy: :crazy: time on here with us Tracey. I'm owned by a springer that doesn't like going for a walk, so hopefully that will give you an idea of what things are like on here :yikes: :yikes: :yikes: :tongueout: :tongueout: :tongueout:


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Re: Despair, anger - newly diagnosed and feel alone!

Postby shazq » Tue Apr 19, 2011 2:31 pm

:welcome: to the crazy club Tracey :wave:
We are a friendly bunch on here and very supportive so feel free to ask any questions. :wave: :cup1:
As a Public Moderator of this forum my opinions/views expressed are personal and are no more valid than those of other members and not necessarily those of UKFibromyalgia.
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Re: Despair, anger - newly diagnosed and feel alone!

Postby denys » Tue Apr 19, 2011 4:35 pm

Hi Tracy and :welcome: to the forum glad you've found us and look forward to getting to know you :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
Denys

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Re: Despair, anger - newly diagnosed and feel alone!

Postby loubie » Tue Apr 19, 2011 7:47 pm

hi tracy :wave: :wave: :wave: :wave: :wave:

welcome to the nut house :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
good to have you with us [chocolate] :wine:
loubie xx

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UKFibromyalgia.
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Re: Despair, anger - newly diagnosed and feel alone!

Postby loopyloo » Tue Apr 19, 2011 8:37 pm

hiya tracy :welcome: to the madhouse it sounds like you'll fit right in with the rest of us, and i agree with you this place is a godsend only on here do you seem to find non judgemental understanding and support the only other people i'm not constantly explaining my self to are my husband and mum, so don't be afraid to share your troubles here we'll all try to help even when it's not about the fibro, :goodluck1: with everything lots of :hugs: :flowers: [chocolate] :wine:
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Re: Despair, anger - newly diagnosed and feel alone!

Postby Annafaith » Tue Apr 19, 2011 9:16 pm

hi tracy :welcome:
hopefully you will find this site usefull :D everyone on here is amazing its really helped me in the last few weeks.
I know just how hard it is when people dont seem to understand, my family are the same thats why i starting councelling on the 6 may maybe that could benifit you, if you think it would ask your gp
:wave: :wave: :flowers: :hugs: :hugs:
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Re: Despair, anger - newly diagnosed and feel alone!

Postby Ldyalb » Tue Apr 19, 2011 10:03 pm

:welcome:

It feels so weird doesn't it? Relief that you know why you feel like you do but also the realisation you actually have a medical condition.

It does get better with time, sometimes you just need to let yourself work through the emotions first :hugs:
'Think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy' - Anne Frank

TMJ, RLS, HMS, Fibro, Dyspraxia - ASD + Dyscalculia overlap, Eczema + Rosacea + suspected Psoriatic Arthritis.

Being an Adult is nothing like it said in the brochure...!
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Re: Despair, anger - newly diagnosed and feel alone!

Postby TraceyGM » Thu Apr 21, 2011 2:58 pm

Thanks to you all for making me welcome and not so alone
Went back to the docs and now trying Amitriptyline, I had a laugh to day when I went to Tesco shopping and forgot where I left my trolley.
I have had a good rest this week from work and caught up with recorded programmes, so desperately want to do gardening but too shattered.
:crazy:
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Re: Despair, anger - newly diagnosed and feel alone!

Postby FluppyPuffy » Thu Apr 21, 2011 3:18 pm

You'll find we all do silly things like you did with the trolley, thanks to the fibrofog. Somewhere on here there is a thread full of all the daft things we do. It gives us all a laugh and helps us realise it's not just one of us being affected by it :facepalm: :facepalm:

For the gardening, maybe starting with something small could help, doing something to a couple of things in pots, then take a break, and so on. Or, in my case, I design and direct while OH does and doglet supervises along with the chooks :dogrun1:


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