Depression

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Depression

Postby migrembe » Mon Sep 16, 2013 10:41 am

I think my biggest problem is depression. I had depression long before i had any (known to me) symptoms of FMS so i know the depression isn't caused because of the the syndrome just yet another added bonus.

However can we cheer up a little please. I know it's difficult. I really do understand, honest i do.

Sitting up at 'silly o'clock' in the morning, not resting but typing away is doing none of us any good. If you have just had the chance to go on a a holiday be grateful for it. There are many of us that either cannot afford a holiday or we are too unwell to actually go.

If you have a Dear ???? then be grateful for them and what they do for you, don't come on here and complain. There are some of us that live alone and if we don't get ourselves to the loo at night we have to pee on the floor or in a bucket and then the following day we have to clean it up.

Don't moan about the benefit system. Yes fight it with your last breath and we will all cheer you along, but moaning just makes you feels bad. Also remember there are some countries who have no benefit system and if you don't work and your family can't take care of you, you starve to death.

Along with all the fibro symptoms, the exhaustion and the depression are the worse and yet again no one can see it.

I have sunshine today and a little rain, but that's life - isn't it?

:clap: :cup1: :grouphug: :hugs: :flowers:
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Re: Depression

Postby FluppyPuffy » Mon Sep 16, 2013 12:41 pm

There is cheeriness and fun on here migrembe, with people sharing their good news and funny stories thru to the thread where we have our various animal friends talking to each other and offering their perspectives and opinions on the things that matter to them :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

For some members tho, here is the only outlet they have for getting things out of their system, be it a lack of sleep, battling the benefits system or something that has happened involving their partners/rellies/friends. We each need a way of letting those pent up worries and frustrations out. If not then things could be a whole lot worse, I can say that from personal experience where I had no where to let things out and I suffered for it, not just with depression and anxiety, but to a point where it was necessary for me to see a therapist for a good number of months as I was completely lost at the time.

Pretty much all of us are more than aware that there are those in the world whose situation is much worse than our own, but to be able to do something that may help, we need to be in our best position possible, and for some, being able to let off steam and air those frustrations it part of what they need to do to get themselves into that best possible place.

WRT partners, I am much much more than grateful to have him in my life, without him I dread to think where I would be. And whilst he may be up on that pedestal I have for him, he is still human, just as I am, and we each have our own foibles along with the bits of ourselves that initially drew us together, and has helped us weather the turmoil that life can throw at us. Whilst most of the time we can put up with the foibles of our significant others, occasionally those times erupt where they become too much and again some only have us as their place to let those things out, and once they have been released, things can quite easily go back to being lighter, brighter and bearable again.
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Re: Depression

Postby denys » Mon Sep 16, 2013 2:11 pm

If members cant come on here for a rant then where can they go, maybe nowhere and then the depression gets worse. We try to taper responses so that a bit of humour can creep in together with the best advice or support we can muster.

So yes sometimes some of the threads can be a little cheerless, but that is how people are feeling and if they are given the impression that people are not going to answer them with a touch of sympathy then its a poor place. If you dont like the tone of a post then you dont have to read it. Go to the positive and fun board that can sometimes raise a bit of a giggle, especially the daft jokes that people post.

Yes we have to try to have a positive attitude and I wholeheartedly agree with you on that, but we are here for when its a bit difficult to see the woods for the trees.

I wonder if maybe starting up the forum cafe again might help to lift the mood, we used to have a right laugh in there eat and drink what we wanted cos its the forum so no calories and no interactions with medication etc. What does everyone think :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: It doesnt have to be a cafe it could be anywhere we like we did have a village at one point, Gill started that one :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: :?:
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Re: Depression

Postby FluppyPuffy » Mon Sep 16, 2013 2:15 pm

Like the sound of that Denys as the :penguin: :penguin: :penguin: :penguin: :penguin: :penguin: :penguin: :penguin: are very much missed :( :( Wonder where they are and what they're up to at the moment??
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Re: Depression

Postby denys » Mon Sep 16, 2013 2:19 pm

Be a nice idea to sneak in and find out :alien: :alien: :alien: :alien: :alien: :alien: :alien: :alien: :alien: :alien: :alien: just in time for :santchimney1: :santchimney1: too :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Re: Depression

Postby FluppyPuffy » Mon Sep 16, 2013 2:29 pm

I just hope the portal doesn't materialise again :yikes: :yikes: :yikes: :yikes: :yikes:
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Re: Depression

Postby denys » Mon Sep 16, 2013 2:37 pm

OOOOoooooooohhhhh I'd forgotten about that, magic we could end up anywhere again, wonder who has been feeding the animals, maybe they have taken over and are feeding Hairy Mary and the others. Can you imagine the smell, dont think the firemen will be able to shift it :yikes: :yikes: :yikes: :yikes: :yikes: maybe moving premises and just taking the ones we want would work. It would have to be done at night so that the steggy gang dont see us :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
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Re: Depression

Postby FluppyPuffy » Mon Sep 16, 2013 2:50 pm

I'd banished Hairy Mary to the back of mind until now :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: The smell is bad and she's not even here :puke: :puke: :puke:
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Re: Depression

Postby denys » Mon Sep 16, 2013 2:55 pm

What was her partner called and the cousin that tagged along with them :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: :?:
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Re: Depression

Postby FluppyPuffy » Mon Sep 16, 2013 2:59 pm

Sweaty Betty and BFB I think :yikes: :yikes: :yikes: :yikes:
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Re: Depression

Postby denys » Mon Sep 16, 2013 3:03 pm

Thats right I remember now and its making my nose burn :yikes: :yikes: :yikes: :yikes: :yikes: :yikes: :yikes: :yikes: :yikes: I think some of our members got locked in the portal too and maybe if we reopen then they will pop back out :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:


Right its decided we reopen but we need a name and a location, Positive and fun again I think what type of place do you think we should have, maybe a leisure centre :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: :?: or a modern coffee shop all posh and shiny :?: :?: :?: :?:
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Re: Depression

Postby migrembe » Mon Sep 16, 2013 7:16 pm

ok now you are all freaking me out with your crazyness :lol: :roll:
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Re: Depression

Postby Flash » Mon Sep 16, 2013 10:39 pm

One of those modern cafes with comfy sofas please, and a fireplace for winter times. On tap calorie free hot chocolate with whipped cream, chunky chips and comfort food on the menu with cheesecake on the sweet board!

We could also have a therapy centre with everything on offer, shiatsu, aromatherapy, reflexology and even a quiet room with a light box to chase away the winter blues.

Can we also have live music nights with all our favourite bands?

Yep, yep, yep, count me in.

Oh, and if you need someone to take care of the animals...
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Re: Depression

Postby Iceskatemum » Tue Sep 17, 2013 2:28 am

It's ok migrembe you get use Flup & Denys after a while...they mean no harm and the men in the white coats come every once in a while and take them back for a quick zzzzzz and a wash and brush up

As for your plea for more positive thinking on the forum , I appreciate research work has proven that thinking of others and positive thinking can ease some of our difficulties & would love to be able to think that way all the time but as they say life gets in the way. I know that many people are struggling with other problems in the world but sometimes just my little world is enough to keep me busy and at other time its my little world that is closing in and I need a listening ear. Its at times like that a bit of Flup madness is enough to make me smile again and the responses of Fm virtual friends are enough to keep me going as I have a limited support network in the "real " world . That doesn't mean I don't empathise with others who are having difficulties its just I don't have enough energy in my envelope to keep me going to do anything about it .

Please accept this is not a critism or that I am trying to undervalue your contribution just a note to let you know how FM affects me and my interaction with the world at large.
I really trust you can continue to chat to us from your happy place :lol: :lol: & you can then provide us all with tips and advice on how to achieve it for ourselves

Good luck
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Re: Depression

Postby whoami » Wed Sep 18, 2013 2:08 am

Migrembe......I can appreciate what you are saying. I too got so tired of all the negativity and sadness people were experiencing. I also got tired of hearing how everyones life sucked and that there was nothing worth living for anymore. I joined support groups in my area only to leave because I would come out more depressed. All i heard are complaints about how people had the worse case of fibromyalgia and nobody had it worse or could ever relate to them..

After a while I really began to listen to these stories. I heard what they were saying. People were desperate, are desperate to hear that something can be done. People can't understand what is happening to them and why.

I started to understand what was being said. I listened to the mother who could no longer play with her children the way she could before. I listened to the wife who could no longer make love with her husband and wondered when he would tire of her. I listened to the young girl who thought that she would never have a boyfriend or children. I listened to the man who felt unworthy, not being able to support his family.

All these people were me. We all suffer from fibromyalgia. We all deal with things the only way we can. We share a common denominator but we are all on our own journey. We all choose to live the best life we can.

Because of medication and a wonderful, no, unbelievable hubby I am now able to live my life in a more positive way. I no longer want to end my life. I want to embrace what I have.

I hope that by listening to those whose journey is on a more rocky road than mine I can help them in some way. Just to listen, not say anything but listen. To understand how they feel and why. To acknowledge their feelings not ridicule them. To be an understanding, caring and respectful friend, I hope that the things I have learned can help them. I hope that the stories I hear will help me when my journey reaches a rocky road again, and it will, or worse a dark cave that I can't find the exit from.

We are all in this together. We take different paths and our experiences may be different. However, we all reach the same end. We all suffer.
[i][b]

Expect the worst in life you won't be disapointed and you'll be prepared!
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