Depression

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Depression

Postby Strawberry » Tue Jan 20, 2009 10:56 am

Hiya everyone

I am really in need of some advice this morning i have reached the lowest ebb ever. I am feeling very very low and have cried for like 4 hours straight (and still going) and feel hopeless. I have not slept all night. :cry:
I am at the doctors this afternoon as i have a UTI/Kidney Infection? and i feel it is the time to maybe bring up that i need some help.
I have put this off for months now and i know i have depression my husband is noticing as is my family. The girl i once knew has dissapeared and all that is left is an empty shell.
I have no life :cry: , lost all interest in my hobbies and also sex life, I hate going out and just want to stay inside, i hate being around my family. :cry:
I am sick of always being ill and going back and forth to the doctors. I am scared though that the doctors will not understand how i am feeling and i do not know how to approach the subject of depression with them. I had a bad experience about 7 years ago when a doctor shouted at me for making a late appointment because i was so scared as i felt so so low and needed to talk to someone.
I am lost i cannot think of what to do :cry: How do i approach them with the line ' I have depression' or do i let them tell me.

Please help

Suze
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Postby andypandy08 » Tue Jan 20, 2009 12:21 pm

hI Suze

I think most of us all feel pretty low at times , the feeling of yet same %$t same day, explain to your doctor just how you feel and let them make their diagnosis.

As regards the depression I really feel for you , I had councilling and it seemed to help, also please remember that ifections as well as this will make you feel worse anyway.

We are all here for ya, if you need to talk to anyone theres literally dozens of us that are willing to chat

hopefully the doctor will understand please let us know

Andy
Fibromyalgia does not define me ~ my spirit does. the path may be different,but the journey is still the same
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Postby smoky » Tue Jan 20, 2009 7:14 pm

hi strawberry
i am so sorry to hear how sad you are feeling.
Two years ago I was in the same position, in tears all the time, etc etc, I put off going to the doctor for ages as i felt i would not be believed and I felt a failure for having to admit depression anyway;
However seeing the doc was the best thing I have ever done; for once i was listened to and began to take medication. I am still taking the meds but the last two years have been the most stable i have ever been, despite now having to deal with a probable diagnosis of FM
I really hope you get the courage to see your doc; good luck and if you need a friendly voice you can pm me anytime
michele

ps i went along with the words i am here because i am feeling very low and i think i need help; they have a series of questions they can then ask to rate how low you are on a scale and from there they will know how to help you
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Postby princess » Tue Jan 20, 2009 7:43 pm

Dear Strawberry,

You are not alone.
Many of us here on the forum have experienced depression that coem with the pain and loss of our as is or as was life.
Please please phone your Drs and make another appointment - is there maybe a lady Dr in the practice that you could speak too.
If you cant find the words then write a letter explaining how you feel and give them that - i have done that before when i wasnt sure what to say about a particular situation.
However please stay with the forum and let us help you if we can
Gentle hugs to you
princess
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Postby smoky » Wed Jan 21, 2009 11:20 am

hope you are feeling a little bettter today suze; i was on the site and thought id let you know that i was thinking about you
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Postby princess P » Thu Jan 22, 2009 5:05 pm

:( Im sorry that you are feeling down but its ok illness gets you down its ok to feel crappy somtimes, there have been times in my life when i feell like im screeming in my head and no one can hear but me, or that im falling constantly and never reaching anywhere. This will get better day by day the most importiant thing is that you recognise when you are down and do somthing about it. This is a good thing trying to catch it before it gets any worse. And somtimes you may have to just say this was a bad day, t6omorrow will be better. My doctor once showed me a picture which was black and white and asked me to point out which colour my mood was that day i pointed to black and he showed me the middle of the picture which had many shades of grey in it,and said you may have more bad days or weeks but somtime you will have a good day and in timeyou will start to have more good days than bad. I hope you get on ok at the docs and if you think you need somthing for it you will find somthing that works for you, like any other meds certain antidepressesants you dont all get it right first time.
Hi any one I have a preliminary diagnosis of chronic widespread pain syndrome, whatever that is but g.p. is convinced its F.M. Sending out good vibes to all . x
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Postby princess » Thu Jan 22, 2009 7:25 pm

Ditto smokeys message
fiona
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Postby Strawberry » Sat Jan 24, 2009 7:38 pm

Hiya so sorry for the late reply just had not had the energy to come n the comp lately.

I seen the doc i burst out crying as soon as he asked me what was wrong, we sat and talked for about 10 minutes before he gave me what he said was my first option. He said i could see a counciller (sp?) but he said that could take some months as they were short staffed. :roll: I also asked about medication and he said he wants to see me in 3 weeks time to assess how i am doing and if i am still wanting the help and feeling low that he will start me on medication.

Having a real bad day today just feeling really hopeless. At work aswell tonight and just have not got the energy as i am hurting all over too :cry: Sick of being and feeling like this.

Thankyou for all the help and support it really does mean alot, thankyou for being you ((hugs))

Love
Suze
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Postby smoky » Sat Jan 24, 2009 9:29 pm

glad to hear you have been to the docs but if you are still feeling so low I would go back, perhaps with hubby and try and get something sorted out sooner; 3 weeks seems an awfully long wait
anyway hugs
michele
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Postby princess » Sat Jan 24, 2009 9:50 pm

Strawberry from one who has been there, go back and start on some medication.
This is a terrible illness and it affects your moods, we all know and most of us have been there.
But its not the end of the world and you will coem out the other end a better person.
I took LUSTRAL for a while at the beginning of my illness and it really helped me get to grips with it all.
That and the correct medication of course.
Thinking of you
princess
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Postby Strawberry » Sun Jan 25, 2009 3:54 pm

Thankyou so much for your support ((hugs))
I have been thinking about going back earlier as i do feel as though tablets could benefit me, i just keep thinking i am probably going to end up being on them anyways, so why delay the process.
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note to Strawberry

Postby ellen b » Sun Jan 25, 2009 6:22 pm

Hi Strawberry,

Hopefully you can find someone at the practice who can help you. I agree with the other postings three weeks is too long. I know GP's are trying not to put anyone on medication but with this illness, this is sometimes the only way that you can deal with it.
Take care and we willing be thinking of you.
Ellen
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Postby tiny clanger » Thu Jan 29, 2009 5:03 pm

Hi Strawberry, read your post and can really understand where you are coming from. Went to the doctors last week absolutely at the end of my tether. Just felt that I had nothing left, and as you said felt like and empty shell and unable to recognise myself as the person I once was. I started on a tri-cyclic anti depressant (Suromontil) as the doc thought it might help with the fibro problems and with the depression. Have been on it a week and already do feel a bit better. You really are not alone, sometiems life can feel like swimming through black treacle, and lots of us can empathise with you. Dont feel alone because you are not even though at times its hard not to feel like the only person in the world who feels so low. Tablets really do help when things get difficult. This is the second time I have had to resort to them but I must admit once I had got over the problem of saying how I felt and accepting that I needed help they have really worked for me. My advice would be that if you are still feeling really low go back and talk to your GP. I dont think waiting 3 weeks is the best plan, once you end up asking for help you usually need it there and then. Take care and remember you are not alone.
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Postby Fog woman » Fri Jan 30, 2009 8:31 pm

I totally understand how you are feeling I've been there & its not nice.

Since I've been on medication there was light at the end of the tunnel. I started to cope with life better, it's never easy with fibro we sure have are challenges.

I know it's a personal thing with pills, you could even try talking to someone maybe family member or GP.
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depression

Postby princess » Fri Jan 30, 2009 8:52 pm

I totally understand too honey i have had qnxiety/depression twice since i became ill 13 years ago.
I didnt think i was depressed but i was scared to go outdoors and even to go under the shower at the end.
Dr put me on valium for l year and then took me off, as he said i was going to be a junkie!!!!!
So it all came back with a vengence.
They gave me BP tablets and sleeping tablets - the two worked on me and i collapsed down to 7 stone from 10 stone - and my hubby took me to A&E.
Dr there asked me if i would hurt myself or anyone else - NO!
Then she checked me out and said if i had been left 2 weeks longer i would have been dead!!!
She suggested i got to a Dr ? who was in the same surgery, which i did and he put me on Lustral anti-depressant and it made me much much better and then i got all my medication. I wasnt daft, i wasnt making it up i was in pain 24/7, not sleeping and no medication - yes i got depressed and anxious - who wouldn't.
But 5 months later i was standing in the Red Centre of Australia myself and felt like a miracle had happened,
I am still in pain, and i still don't sleep well - but i am here and i am gracious to the Dr who helped me.
I have since moved house, but my new Dr knows all of this and is very sympathetic.
I was on huge amount of Valium, and i now know that is not the medication for me unless really needed, i don't want to have to go throught withdrawals every again, without medication.
So there is light at the end of the tunnel.
You just need to have the right Dr and the right medication, anti-depressants are the crutch that we all need now and again especially when we are so ill.
(I have only ever shared that with this forum, not because i am embarrased i had depressions, but because i was so angry with my Dr - but well now ......................................if i ever feel bad again im right around to my own DR and i will take anti-depressants if needed again.
Hope this helps
From my heart this story.
Princess
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