Newbie

[sparky630]

Hi everyone I am new to this website but not new to FM. I have suffered FM for 3yrs now but I am still going round and round in circles. Fatigue is my major issue with daily arguments between my head and my body. I feel lazy if I rest and have tried to keep going without sucess. I have a disability assisstance dog that I am supposed to walk daily. I.have an elec w/chair but at the moment I am not even managing this so I just feel huge guilt and a failure. I just need to be in bed as we have found the only way 4 me to get out of a flare up is to sleep it off but I find it hard to just give in and sleep knowing that my hubby has to walk him and look after the children and run the house. Has anyone any advice? Do I just need to get a grip and walk him? I have below waist nerve damage and pain from a back injury and type 2 diabetes.

[masonsbarms]

hi sparky, the advice i am always reading on here is listen to your body if its saying rest that is what it needs,

i get the whole guilt thing its part of us all but it sounds like you are not trying to balance things well a bit like me a while ago.

if you need to sleep to get over things then that is what you need, there is a diffrence in giving in and getting better you are not lazy you have a horrid condition that is zapping your enerdy and you need to re charge,

i am still trying to pace and balance and im getting better at it i have even learned to leave the house work if i dont feel up to it and do what i can when i can,

if you keep pushing ang giving yourself extra stress by feeling guilty then you will still be in the circle of crash burn.

try to be a bit kinder to yourself and do things in little bits two weeks dust dosent look any difffrent than one week dust my hubby says and hes right.

i hope that you get the rest you need and start to gain control and feel better soon.

take care xx

[sparky630]

Its so nice to speak to someone who knows how I feel. Your msge has made me cry with relief
Thankyou so much xxx

Ps how do I look at the views lol x

[masonsbarms]

hi, im glad i helped you a little and you will get more help and support from others,

if i understand you right, on the top you will see view new post and view your post click on these and the should come up.

you make sure you take care of yourself the you may start to feel a little better xx

[sparky630]

Wow I've just realised u live in Preston...so do i... how spooky ur the 1st person Ive spoken to on here xxx

[FluppyPuffy]

to the forum sparky

Sorry to hear how things are for you at the moment, fatigue seems to be one of the major problems for a lot of us Not sure what to suggest about it tho as I'm still trying to get that bit to behave and that's after 12 years of living with this

I think we've all had the same thoughts and feelings that you're having. I know my failure, guilt and lazy demons sometimes get the better of things, even tho my OH doesn't say anything about how I am. To me, most of it seems to stem from just me, and how I think I should be rather than how I actually am. I know it's difficult, but as MB has mentioned, being a little kinder to ourselves can help, along with knowing what our capabilities are and working with them rather than battling uphill with them every day

WRT your doglet, could you go out in your leccy chair to walk him??? Just a thought, or if doglet isn't too good or unsure of the chair, go out with both of them when hubby walks the doglet so doglet gets used to the chair and you get to a point where you can go out in your chair with doglet. Also, mental stimulation can be just as tiring for our waggy friends as a walk, so using treats and/or part of his food allowance in things like treat dispensing toys, or even old boxes and things can help as it means they have to work to get the reward.

There's all sorts of info and advice across the various parts of the forum, maybe having a bit of a look thru things could throw up some helpful suggestions for you. And you can ask about things as well, it doesn't usually take too long for someone to along with a reply. With the different members on here, there's a good chance that someone will have experienced something similar to what you're wanting to know about

[sparky630]

Thank u so much for that lovely message. Its true wot u say about the feelings and demons being in ur own head.
Regarding my pup.

He is a fully trained disability assisstance dog. He does tasks round the house and has the same rights as a guide dog wen we go out. He is trained to walk by my w/chair. My prob at the moment is having the actual energy to get out of bed and get ready. B.
This is wht I feel so bad about not walking him.
What I keep doing is staying in bed til about 2 30 as I have promised to rest but then I get an attack of guilt late aft so I get up which gets my hubby mad as he has asked me to properly give in, go to bed for a few days and really rest.

He has promised to walk dog for a few days so that I can do this.

Hope this makes sense, i cant type any more
Xxxx

[masonsbarms]

hi, i know how hard it is to just give in and do what hubby has said as im the same,

i have just come home and went upstais to make the bed, hubby told me to sit down and he would do it so i hoovered up,

im now in the dog house and been made to sit down,

if you can do as he wants you to and then you go gently you may find a bit of youe missing energey,

and yes i live between preston and chorley in bamber bridge you are the second person on here iv talked with from preston.

maybe when you are feeling better we could meet for a brew.

take care xx

[shazq]

to the forum sparky.

[sparky630]

Thanx so much to everyone who has replied u have helped me know end in such a short time.
Regarding that brew Masonbarms....... that wud be lovely. Do u go to a supportgroup?
xxxx

[masonsbarms]

hi, i will be going to my first meeting this month as the chorley group have started to have thier meetings very close to my home,

so i am looking forward to meeting new friends and picking up some tips and advice,

i am glat to here that we have been some help to you and you feel a little easyer .

when you feel like meeting up if you pm me we can make arrangements,

i hope that you do get the rest you need and feel more able to do what you want soon,

take care xx

[denys]

Hi Sparky and to the forum

[sparky630]

@masonbarms

Please will u let me know details of ur fibro meeting and how it goes?

I did try a group but it was a bit of a competition of who had most illnesses and who felt worse and I'm really not into that. At the end of the day

We r all poorly and we cant measure pain. It really put me off going.

Good luck I hope u meet some nice people and get some support.

Xxx

[sparky630]

Just wanted to say big thanx to all who replied, u ve really helped. Xxxxx

[masonsbarms]

hi, i will let you know how it gos i hope its not like you experienced as i dont want that either i just want to be able to gain tips and advice ,

i think that they have people who come and give talks and i know they are planing a christmas party and a lady who dose therapy sessions at discount .

dont forget if you fancey meeting up just pm me i am normaly finished work by 3pm but some days its 2pm .

take care xx